I'm the one true god. Can you prove me wrong? Would you risk your soul doubting me? If you can't prove me wrong, I'll be setting up a paypal account so you can start sending me 10% of your income.

Also to the person who is going to pray to me to win the lottery. I ran some tests and I found out you had to win 4 lotteries before you believed I was the true god and giving you 4 lotteries messed up my ultimate plan so you ended up not winning the lottery because it doesn't prove my point. So by the shear fact that you didn't win the lottery proves, I'm the one true god.

NeedKarma

Sorry Michael, the Great Flying Spagetti Monster has appeared before me and touched me in places that felt good. There is documented proof of his existence:

michealb

The Great Flying Spaghetti Monster is a powerful being known by many names but he only wishs to temp you away from the truth.

NeedKarma

My wife also mentions that he is inside her. She now has a feeling of peace and wishes to have a cigarette.

michealb

I have given you free will and although I could take it from you and force you to believe. Your non-believe only hurts you in the long run and doesn't interfere with my ultimate goal.
I highly suggest though that you listen to Pascal's wager and believe that this is the true god that is speaking to you.

Wondergirl

I had heard the True God was a perfect speller and used good grammar and punctuation.

michealb

I speak all languages that have ever been or ever will be however in order for a plan to unfold properly things you see as errors are actually required when you see the larger picture.

Wondergirl

The True God is good with commas too.

michealb

Again you see them as errors but if you could see the larger picture. You would understand that it is written the way it needs to be written.

Wondergirl

Hallelujah!