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Home > Family & People > Relationships   »   year and a half and wants a break

 
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Old Aug 15, 2007, 03:04 AM
kyle22
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year and a half and wants a break

first i just want to say thanx for a site to tlk to people and hope to get good response

so the first year of our relationship was awesome we never fought or anything and then she got a new group of friends which i thought would be good since she didn't have a lot of friends before that. now i am regretting it because since then she has changed and about a month ago she told m she wanted a break i told her i understand and that i will give her the space she needs. she told me it was not a break up just a break and i was glad. but now we have officially broken up since a week ago i have been miserable and cant stop thinking about her. i was always overprotective and prob. a little jelause of her new friends that she spent more time with than me. i regret being so clingy and giving up all of my friends for her because now i have to make new friends and it suks. she still wants to be best friends she said and she said she still loves me she just need time to sort out her own problems and is not ready to GROW UP im confused why she would leave me if she still loves me so please help me im only 18 and already heart broken it suks! hope to get some good responses!

also she said she doesnt want a boy friend or any romantic relationships and said that i would be the first person on her list if she wanted a bf cause she still loves me. which just gives me hope when i know i need to move on im soo confused thnx for helping!

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Old Aug 15, 2007, 04:19 AM   #2  
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let me do some math here, 18 minus 1 1/2 equals 16 1/2 and she is 16, minus 1 1/2... well I get the point. Does anyone else?

Dear Kyle, welcome to the forum. After answering to another poster with similar heartaches and posting this one, I hope that you did not expect this relationship to be the one and only in your life.

Dating is about learning how to cope and grow with another person and getting closer than anyone else before. From these relationships we get a taste of emotional capabilities that are new and it is hard to give these up. You don't have to give anything up, you just have to accept these as part of your life and accept that she is going through these growing pains as well. All we can expect in these relationships is happiness, pain, or apathy.

At your age, you both will probably meet and love a lot more people during your journey and I hope that with most of them, you'll have fond memories of the time that you had together. That's what makes us human.

Respect her wishes as you'd want her to respect your wishes if you wanted space, and believe me there will be times when you need time to collect yourself and the young lady will be as confused as you are now.

Keep in touch and read more from those that are going through what you are, it helps to know that you are not alone.

Good luck.


Life would be so boring without learning all about it.

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talaniman agrees: So true
kyle22 agrees: U were right about being to young and other people out there thnx
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Old Aug 15, 2007, 04:29 AM   #3  
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This is hard for you, you are still young and im assuming she is as well.......going by experience and knowing about other peoples relationships at your age it usually never lasts....she may want to experience meeting other people.......I hate to say this to you but when she said you would be the first person if she wanted a bf....i feel that maybe to let u down gently....All you can do is try and go out with whoever you friends may be and try you best to keep yourself busy, I wouldnt contact her also as its her that has made the decision so in my opinion its up to her to correct it if she wants to...........I know this probably isnt the answer you were wanting to hear but a lot of the time this is how it turns out.........I live in hope as well of getting back with some1 but deep down i know that aint gonna happen......

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kyle22 agrees: yeah i think she was trying to be nice thnx for the help
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Old Aug 15, 2007, 04:37 AM   #4  
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You are not alone as everyone goes thru the break up confusion, at one time or another. Yes it sucks when life around us changes, and what we were use to and comfortable with is gone. But give her what she wants, and turn your attention to something else you enjoy, and be happy being single. The sooner you accept her leaving, the sooner you can start building a life that you enjoy without her in it. Find your own happiness, and someone will want to share it with you. Much Luck.
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Old Aug 15, 2007, 04:57 AM   #5  
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I'm going through the exact same thing, just 2 years younger than you.

I know how you feel.. like there was no other girl for you, you can't imagine being single again.. you can't picture yourself with another girl.

I tell you now, forget about her coming back. I thought the exact same thing when my now ex told me she wanted a break 2 weeks ago. I thought we would go on a break and then she'd want to be in a relationship again. Me nor you will ever get our girlfriends back, and after realising what she's really like.. I don't want her back.

I'm going out to meet new people and to get away from her as possible. Your old friends.. give them a call and tell them you're sorry for ditching them and now you realise what's important to you.

Don't let the girl string you along. Go out, have fun and maybe you'll find someone new. Don't wait on her. She'll contact you when she realises what she's missing (if she does realise)

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kyle22 agrees: yeah i read yours and inspired me to put my own up
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Old Aug 15, 2007, 09:06 AM   #6  
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yeah all of u are right and thats just how i have to look at it, its just soo hard letting go lol well atleast i can party without feeling guilty thanx again and i love this forum or website if u may ok well thank you for the advice and ill talk to every one l8ter
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Old Aug 15, 2007, 02:36 PM   #7  
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well earlier today she called and i didn't answer it went straight to my voice mail she said tat she was calling to see how everything is going and if i wanted to hang out i havn't called back yet should i?
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Old Aug 15, 2007, 02:38 PM   #8  
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oh and just wants to hang out as "FRIENDS" which i feel would be very hard for me, because last time we did that i broke down and told her i love her and kept whining im sure was very annoying to her so i don't want to do that again so should i even hang out with her?
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Old Aug 15, 2007, 03:03 PM   #9  
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Hec No!!!And don't call her back either. You'll see this very pattern in other posts of people going thru the same thing.You don't think she knows you want to be more than friends?? Of course she knows and any contact by her is mean't to get you confused and hopeful, so you can't move on. Stay with no contact.

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kyle22 agrees: yeh thats wat i though thnx great advice
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Old Aug 15, 2007, 05:50 PM   #10  
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thnx every one im already feeling better about all of this and relize shes not the only girl out there and she cant jus keep me on a chain so thanx a lot and hope to talk to all of u soon about how im better and i got over her which will prob. take a while but its ok i need to and thanx again i wont contact her promise
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