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He said "I want to spend the rest of my life with you and give you all the things you deserve.". Refers to you sometimes as his wife and himself sometimes as your husband. When not at work the time is spent together. Live together,spend time with both families and acts as if married. Closed about talking on relationship. Says that if you have already confessed love and commitment there is no need to discuss it. Has not proposed. What can I do?
In a relationship where two parties are getting seroius and talking or thinking about life together, both parties should be free to discuss thier relationship, and should have serious talks about it.
I agree with Fr Chunk that you both need to have a good talk together and see where the two of you are going.
From your post it sounds like you are both really in love and have alot going for you both !! Do we need to have a piece of paper to confirm what we already know in our hearts ??
How long have you both been together and how long have you been living together ??
hi wannabemarried,
i do see a problem here. you say that he says:"if you have already confessed love and commitment there is no need to discuss it". im not sure whether this refers to marriage itself or even the expression of love. either way, here you are on a forum looking for answers, rather than seeking them of the man you hope understands you better than anyone.
communication obviously needs to be worked on here. what do both of you want? marriage appears to be important to you. are you willing to continue this relationship if it is not an option? (ie if he does not and never wants to marry anyone) and does that mean you are then compromising your ideals? only you can answer these questions. but before you broach the topic again, be sure you know these answers yourself. i do feel you need to discuss this with your mate in depth. if he is not willing to discuss the relationsip, how well are you "relating"? is that enough for you? are you the type of person who needs to discuss the varying stages in relationships or can you just go with the flow without conversation? neither is right or wrong, everyone is different - but you must be sure what type of personality complements your needs before you jump into marriage.
if you aren't getting what you want from a CONVERSATION about marriage, then do you think the marriage itself will hold up? just keep your needs in mind, and hopefully your beloved will understand how important this is to you. Good luck!
Marriage definition is different for different people. Some believe that the commitement is good enough and do not need the peace of paper and others believe it is very important. For him not to want to talk about it causes problems right away. Relationships should be open communication about anything. When communications start to close it could cause problems. Marriage is a commitement to each other and God that you will be life long parntners. I myself personally, want the church involved and signing and witnesses and family.
I do not understand why you are so negative wannabemarried. I was just stating what I believe is important in a relationship. I was making comments. So you do not agree that to have a good relationship the communication needs to be open?
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