Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    BILLYJADEN's Avatar
    BILLYJADEN Posts: 22, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #21

    Mar 4, 2008, 08:46 AM
    I Did Give Her Enough Attention.its Just Selfish Ness On Her Part. I Know I Can Show Her The World And Make Her Happy. But With Her Rejections And Being So Sure Of Me Being There She Is Making It Hard For Me To Do That. I Don't Want To Emmbarase Myself.
    bellababy60's Avatar
    bellababy60 Posts: 41, Reputation: 3
    Junior Member
     
    #22

    Mar 4, 2008, 09:48 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by BILLYJADEN
    My Ex Girlfriend And I Broke Up 3 Months Ago. She Broke Up With Me Because I Was Going Out With Myfriends To much and things we couldnt agree on. Ive told her that im a changed man but she doesnt beleive me. She tells me she is happy being by herself.Ever since we broke up we have kept in touch. We talk almost everyday. She text message me and calls me to see how im doing. Im moving on. But i want to know what her true intentions really are by her calling me/texing me all the time?
    I think that you are prolonging the pain. You should show her that you've changed by not being so dependent on what SHE thinks and WANTS for herself. She is being selfish by not allowing you to live your life in the manner and degree to which you are comfortable. She's probably the type of person who really LOVED your friends up front so they would convince you "what a great catch she was..." HA! Women do that all the time and then they become resentful of you when you give soooo much of yourself and start "taking back"... you have the right to have your space. You're not married to the woman! Don't continue to "drag" this s**t out as my ex would say... she's stringing you along because she can't deal with her OWN pain of the separation... let it go before you go completely insane over this!
    BILLYJADEN's Avatar
    BILLYJADEN Posts: 22, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #23

    Mar 4, 2008, 10:10 AM
    Exactly.after we broke up in january she wanted to work things out in her own way. She said we can work things out slowly but if i say i want to be alone u need to leave me alone.. thats when i flipped out and said hell f*&k no there is no way i work things out that way. Anyway i told her to get to the point and she falt out told me she wants to be alone and she doesn't see us getting back together anytime soon. After that i get text/call on the weekends and weekdays. Sometimes we hang out for dinner. But other than that i just don't know what she is holding on too. What i don't get is how she want to keep in touch if she doesn't want to be with me?
    bellababy60's Avatar
    bellababy60 Posts: 41, Reputation: 3
    Junior Member
     
    #24

    Mar 4, 2008, 10:29 AM
    BILLYJADEN my friend... I hopoe this will help you... came from a cool rap song. "IT'S OKAY TO LOSE SOMEONE OVER YOUR PRIDE...DON'T LOSE YOUR PRIDE OVER SOMEONE YOU LOVE..yeah baby...that's what I'm talking about. She wants to be alone.....leave her alone. Looks like she's calling all the shots here - and you're letting her. Stop it my friend. She's playing games with you...I wouldn't do that to my worst enemy. I have not contacted my "ex" in over a week and the feelings are still "raw"... but hey, does he care enough to call and find out how I'm dealing with MY pain? Nope! And... do I care? NOPE! I only care ABOUT ME right now, and so should you. Let her go.. there are so many other deserving women out there for a man like you. BUCK UP (as my dad would say... )
    BILLYJADEN's Avatar
    BILLYJADEN Posts: 22, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #25

    Mar 4, 2008, 10:54 AM
    Oh Yea.. ill Do That.. your The Best.. thanks.. I Know This Will Defenitely Help.. first Serious Relationship Here.. thanks
    BILLYJADEN's Avatar
    BILLYJADEN Posts: 22, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #26

    Jun 29, 2009, 08:32 PM
    Heartbreak sucks
    Me and my ex girlfriend tried to work things out 4 times for the pass year. I know it sounds stupid and pathetic but I never knew love would take me this far. For the pass year its being an emotionally roller coaster for me. My ex would text me and call me with tears that she wants me back trusting her I would take her back and for some reason she would take it back and say she is confused after two weeks.Ive being there for this girl and be the best boyfriend I can be. I did my research if another person was involved and nothing seem suspicious.its being 1 month since the last time she's done this and I took the initiative to cut it off completely.Shes tried to contact me on private calls but I've ignore her and went to the NC rule. Im still hurt but I really would like to know why she did this 4 times after begging me that she is so sure she wants to be with me. Last Saturday I had a dream with her and out of the blue I broke my NC rule. I texted her how she was doing and what was new in her life. I also asked her if she was still confused and she responded "why im i asking her that question". After going back and forth on why I was asking that question I felt stupid so cut of the conversation after agreeing we are just going to be friends.. After all the run around with the question her response was "what difference does it make if she is or not". I responded that its just something that came to mind.. neatless to say she said no she is not confused... any advice
    s_cianci's Avatar
    s_cianci Posts: 5,472, Reputation: 760
    Uber Member
     
    #27

    Jun 29, 2009, 08:34 PM
    My advice to you is to pick up and move on with your life, without her. I can't begin to guess why she's acting the way she is and I don't want to try. But she obviously isn't right for you and you need to accept that fact.
    BILLYJADEN's Avatar
    BILLYJADEN Posts: 22, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #28

    Jun 29, 2009, 08:46 PM

    Thanks for the response. S_cianci. So do you think its normal for a girl to act this way... She is 24 and I'm 27.. I'm willing to move on but before I do I would like to really know why she did this to me after me being the so called perfect boyfriend and the man of her dreams.
    cptcaveman420's Avatar
    cptcaveman420 Posts: 11, Reputation: 4
    New Member
     
    #29

    Jun 29, 2009, 09:10 PM
    One thing that you need to learn about females.. Never try to figure out what their thinking. All that does is drive you crazy and cause you to have grey hair by the age of 30.. Think for yourself and do what's right for you and everything will work out in the long run. As s_cianci posted, I would move on and worry about what I needed to do to better myself. It might take a while but things will get better
    friend4u178's Avatar
    friend4u178 Posts: 3,349, Reputation: 1584
    Ultra Member
     
    #30

    Jun 29, 2009, 09:12 PM
    She did it because you kept responding and letting her know you were there at her beckoned call , and she'll keep doing it if you let her.

    Let her be and find someone stable you can have a proper relationship with , lifes too short to waste on unhealthy relationships.
    Dazednconfused4's Avatar
    Dazednconfused4 Posts: 8, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #31

    Jul 4, 2009, 11:06 PM

    I agree... You do need to think about yourself first..
    There is always 2 sides involved when dealing with relationships.. You never know what is going on in her head or in her heart, but if you do continue thinking about what she's thinking you are def going to drive yourself insane..

    You never know.. Maybe she is confused.. Maybe you guys went through a lot and things pushed her away... or maybe she is not in love... Or maybe you she does not deserve an amazing man like you.. There are so many maybes, what's ifs, whys.

    If God wants you two to be together then it will happen...

    I suggest you don't ask her how she feels because In my opinion you might just be causing pressure and stress on her especially if she does not know what she wants...

    Put yourself first... You never know what can happen in life... Take it day by day
    PeruvianBlaze's Avatar
    PeruvianBlaze Posts: 16, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #32

    Jul 4, 2009, 11:39 PM
    A relationship consists of two people who contribute to make the relationship work. You can only take care of your part and do what you can to support and care for your partner. When the other person does not, then there really isn't much you can do. Whatever your ex may be thinking or feeling, you cannot always know and you really cannot change it. You must continue with your life and move on. Of course it will hurt and it will be hard. But if you've been the best boyfriend you can be and she cannot decide what to do then it is time to move one and find someone who WILL love you and who won't be confused. Best of luck!
    a1b2c3d4's Avatar
    a1b2c3d4 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #33

    Oct 22, 2010, 09:31 AM
    What I got to know from this, girls cannot be easily understood. Either they are tough, or we guys are not so matured to understand them(have to agree). I have also gone through situation like this. All I learnt is patience and perseverance in a good way. Don't be pestering her or irritate her or take your anger out on her, leave it cool. She will realise, and if that has to happen and will come back to you slowly. But, you should have a neutral emotion, not too sad, not too happy, at the same time, not sad and not happy too. I know its confusing, but just be in touch with her, make her feel by your silence, that you want her and that you cannot live without her, at the same time, you not taking the approach to get her back. She should and would ultimately. Pray to God, definitely he would help. There is nothing impossible with God.
    bellababy60's Avatar
    bellababy60 Posts: 41, Reputation: 3
    Junior Member
     
    #34

    Oct 24, 2010, 12:23 PM
    It doesn't sound like she fell "out of love" with you if she still cries about the situation ending. Love is a very deep emotion that can manifest itself through feelings of hate or denial, but if she is hurting from the break up, then she is still in love with you. It sounds to me like she wants to be in "control" of the relationship, and if she cannot have you for herself and manipulate you into leaving your friends behind, then she will perform a maneuver in her life with is what I call self destructive behavior in order to obtain control over you. She will make it look like YOU'RE the reason the relationship isn't working, when all in all, she just may not be clear on what she wants from life. She may not want you to "discover" things about herself that may cause you to leave her in the future. Maybe she has a fear of abandonment so she will most likely destroy what you have together by using a superficial means of self-sabotage. How many relationships has she "ended" in her past... or how long were any of her previous relationships. That would be a good indicator of why you are not together now. If she has established "patterns" like this in her life, it doesn't mean she cannot love anyone... it just means that she doesn't really know how to express it effectively. She's afraid of it.

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search


Check out some similar questions!

Private calls [ 2 Answers ]

How do I trace a private number?

Phone Calls [ 3 Answers ]

:( my husband and I have known the other for a year this past may '07, but we got married feb '07. I found numbers in his wallet and found out he had been calling these two women. He works hard and takes care of our family and I know he loves the hell out of me. We have a very good sex life and...

How Serious Should One Take These Calls? [ 2 Answers ]

Lets say if one who owes debts received calls from collections agencies (ie Zwicker & Associates) or people whom self proclaimed "lawyers", what are the reality of getting sued and getting a judgement against you? Do you guys suggest avoiding these calls? How about letters stating debts as...


View more questions Search