Why does my boyfriend abuse me?

88sunflower · Jun 9, 2009, 11:22 AM

Because you let him, simple as that.
Get out and stop the abuse!

justcurious55 · Jun 9, 2009, 11:24 AM

Sunflower is 100% correct. Sure, he's got some issues going on that started the abuse. But the bottom line for why it continues is because you allow it. Someone on here wrote this beautiful, but chilling, poem the other day. I'm going to go look for it and if I find it I'm coming back and posting it for you to read. It was about an abusive relationship and I think it would wake you up.

justcurious55 · Jun 9, 2009, 11:30 AM

"paigerwaiger94
New Member

I got flowers today.
What do you think of my poem? Please, I need help on whether its good enough to send into a competion.

I got flowers today.

I got flowers today.
It wasn't my birthday, or any other special day.
Last night, we had our first fight.
He yelled at me, and said some cruel things,
But I know he must be sorry,
Because he sent me flowers today.
I got flowers today.
It wasn't our annaversary, or any other special day.
Last night, he hit me.
But I know he must be sorry,
Because he sent me flowers today.
I got flowers today.
It wasn't mothers day, or any other special day.
Last night, he beat me again.
It was much worse than anytime before.
He shoved me into a wall, and choked me.
I can't leave him.
What about the kids?
What about money?
I got flowers today.
Today WAS a special day.
Today was the day of my funeral.
Last night, he finally beat me to death.
If only I had had the strength to leave him,
I would not have gotten flowers today.
-paige.

Im only fifteen. Please don't be harsh. I watched this happen with my mother. She was my inspiration."

Maybe this in an extreme case. Not every woman dies because of an abusive boyfriend or husband. But why take the risk? Why allow it? There's no reason for it. Forget love. He doesn't love you. Not if he claims to show it with his fists. I'll bet he calls you names, or puts you down telling you that you can't do this or that you can't do that? Guess what. You can leave. You can walk away from it all.

88sunflower · Jun 9, 2009, 11:32 AM

The poem says it all. Just read it and read it. Sends chills doesn't it? Well it happens.

HistorianChick · Jun 9, 2009, 11:41 AM

The question shouldn't be "Why does my boyfriend abuse me?", but "Why do I let him?"

Honey, no one has the right to do anything to you against your wishes. Don't ask why he hits you, change the cycle.

Do not let him hit you.
Do not let him abuse you.
Do not let him call you names.
Put an end to this.
It is not healthy and it will not help you.

Romefalls19 · Jun 9, 2009, 11:42 AM

Because you allow it

Leave him and it takes away his power and control over you

susangpyp · Jun 9, 2009, 11:45 AM

You get what you put up with.

Love is an action. It's not what you say, it's what you do. If he is abusing you, he does not love you. If you are allowing it, you do not love yourself and therefore are incapable of loving another. Abusive relationships have nothing whatsoever to do with love.

88sunflower · Jun 9, 2009, 11:59 AM

Not to mention you want to know the reason why he does it? What does it matter? There is no logical reason to it. He is abusive and your taking it and now want the reason behind it. We are telling you. The reason he is doing it is because you are letting him.

makapuu · Jun 9, 2009, 12:06 PM

Your boyfriend abuses you because you let him, and then you protect him.
If any boyfriend of mine hit me, I'd call the police and have him arrested and then I'd file a restraining order on him. But that's just me, I grew up with older brothers and had my share of fights, some of which I won. So to protect any guy that picks a fight with me, he'd be safer in jail.

Why does my boyfriend abuse me?

Check out some similar questions!