Why do we always fall in love with the wrong person?

Andreas_111 · Apr 13, 2008, 10:26 AM

Hi, I have a small question. Why do we always fall in love with the wrong person? And by doing that end up being hurt all the time but have a great difficulty to let go!
Thanks for your time.

jennyboo122292 · Apr 18, 2008, 11:21 AM

Well everyone just wants to be loved, so when someone treats you well, you start to like it and gain feelings for them.

im in love with a guy that my parents dont like and are trying to make sure we have no contact, but really he is a good guy..

Andreas_111 · Apr 19, 2008, 06:41 AM

Tnks for your opinions. They have been very helpful. I wish love wasn't so blind! The think I wonder is: What does it take to love someone? I mean does staying with her a large time make you love her? I know you must like the others character, care a lot and also have a sexual attraction, but what else? I have some idea on this but I want to hear what others have to say too.

Homegirl 50 · Apr 20, 2008, 10:06 AM

If you have all those things that attract you to a person, you spend enough time with them you can love them. If you are attracted to a person and their qualities romantically, real and lasting love can grow. But by the same token, you can love a person and not love them romantically.
Oftentimes, people are looking for the "bang" to happen to let them know they are in love, when they could already be in love. It's like not being able to see the forest for the trees.
Love is complicated, but I don't think it's blind. Love does not blind you to faults, love lets you see them and choose to love the person inspite of them. You are blinded because you choose not to see them.
JMHO

dazedconfused4 · Apr 21, 2008, 04:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Andreas_111

Hi, I have a small question. Why do we always fall in love with the wrong person? And by doing that end up being hurt all the time but have a great difficulty to let go!
Thanks for your time.

i wish i had the answer to that. love hurts.. this is a lot easier said than done. however, remember that you can't be happy in a relationship or truly find love without loving yourself first. i struggle with it everyday. you deserve all that life has planned for you. don't settle for someone who does need you, respect you, or cherish you. i try to tell myself that everyday. but its hard. i fell in love with someone i know was mentally incapable of having a lasting relationship b/c of the way he lives his life, but i couldn't leave him until i wasn't given a choice because i cared about him too much and worried about him too much to not be with him. hang in there things will get better!!!



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