I am just really curious, there are alot of regulars on here and ive read their stories over the last few months. Just wondering how everyone is doing.

Personally Im at almost 3 months since the breakup. First month and a half was absolute hell, but its gotten way better. Went 55 days NC before she called me this week to ask something stupid. I thought I would be back to day 1 but an hour after talking to her I was fine again thank goodness. I still think about her WAY too much, but I have gone hours without the thought of her crossing my mind. I have focused more on work again, and am eating/sleeping properly again. Outlook is neutral (at least its not super negative). I have been seeing someone new casually but its really tough because of the whole 'my ex did this better etc' hopefully that goes away soon.


So how is everyone else doing? I feel some weird bond with all of you going through this CRAP at the same time as I.

kaitou

It's been a year for me, and a i feel GREAT!! I spent most of my time improving myself, setting goals and etc. I have more self-confidence, and am happier with myself now. Although i dunno how i would react if i see my ex again, so i hope he's doing well, and i hope i won't bump into him for another at least another 5 years.

madaman

Yeah Today would be roughly the 4 month mark, 3 months of NC for me. It really does get better, even if its very very slow progress. I still miss her more than anything, and the fun we had. I also realize that she isnt who I made her out to be.

chris08

I've done a really terrible thing, i have been doing so well with no contact over the last few weeks n then i get a moment of madness last night when i got home after a night out i sent my ex a text saying 'take me back steph' i feel so bad and i've let myself down. oh god

madaman

Meh, not a big deal we all slip every now and then. Just remember how doing this made you feel afterwards, and you wont do it again. Definetely dont be so hard on yourself please. Next time you get the urge to send her a text or whatever, just post here and we will all smack you around.

madaman

So just checking up on everyone who has been posting these last few months. How is everyone doing/where are you in the whole process?

I think I may have finally made it over that final hill myself, I actually went a whole day without thinking about the ex which is something I never thought possible. Christmas might still be a little sad but I can truly say that I dont have any feelings for my ex anymore. Time really did a great job wearing the memories down.

N0help4u

Though the years of having a boyfriend vs not bothering with any guys I have found that I am more have direction, am at peace and can think more clearly when I don't have a guy in my life.

Chery

My BF and I were together on and off since 1999. I have always done the compromising. When we broke up the first time, I was the one who left and felt fine without him, even though we live in the same building. He always walked by my window at least once a day to irritate me, and it did then. A few months later, he knocked on my door (before Xmas) and left a plate of a casserole that he cooked. The next day he asked me if I liked it and we started talking again. He invited me up to his place, but I told him I was busy and I might have time the next day. We were together again for two years since then. This year, in October, I found out I have lung cancer, and naturally I told him, and went through a very depressed period and got absolutely no emotional support from him. One night, Oct 13th, I went to my place in the evening to sleep there because I had enough of his coldheartedness and to spend time with my cat. I fell asleep and spent the night. The next morning, the lock to his door was changed and I could not get in. What a way for a guy to break up - I guess he thought it was catching or he did not want to live with someone who was going to die soon, but he still has my stuff in his place.. and I am not in a hurry to get any of it.
I feel free, happy, not depressed or stressed anymore and spend a lot of time doing things I love doing, seeing my family, playing with my grandson, and not spending or wasting one minute thinking about that jerk. I now know what he is really like and am glad I don't have to put up with him.
I will get my stuff back from him one day, even if I have to take a baseball bat with me, I have nothing left to lose now and am not stressed by him at all. He knows this through his son who is my son-in-law.. and now leaves me alone and does not walk by my window anymore. His son now knows what a cruel person he is and so do all the neighbors.. who all of a sudden invite me over to dinner or lunch - it's kind of funny when he looks out his window and sees them coming to visit me or driving me to go shopping. I guess he thought I'd be a recluse and depressed - NOT
So, folks, those that hurt us and are cold-hearted, get paid back one way or the other.. just keep that in mind - they don't get away with it so easy

I hope this is a consoling thought for all of you still in pain
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Maggie83

Hi guys im new to this but im at about the week 10 stage...im seriously trying no contact now its really tough and im still thinking what if. My ex and i have both broken N/C at various times and the longest its been without contact has been 14 days so now im giving it a real go for my sanity and to give her some space!!

This site has helped me no end, ive said things on here i wouldnt say to my dearest friend and i am thankful for all of the feedback my question has been given!!

xcookiemonstorx

well tonight thanks to advice on this sit im goin NC. i just redid my myspace and took everything and every picture of my ex off. i just found out he was cheating on me 2 days ago. merry christmas huh? its all so confusing to me. i cant eat or sleep. i was willing to try and work things out after our break but hes still talking to the girl. ive lost all trust in people. i see that no matter how much you love someone and know them, that you really dont know them. you dont know whats in there head or what they want or what they would be willing to give up for a fling. NC is gonna be so hard for me.

N0help4u

They say it takes two and I have found that to be most true when it comes to working things out. I have seen for myself that it doesn't take two to fight or break up, but it does take two to make things work!


Time heals all wounds and you have to learn from the past so you don't repeat the same.
I think one thing that is important is being choosier in what you want in a relationship.