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she: what are your plans for this evening?
him: i plan to go to the store and pu one item.
she: ok, i will talk to you later.
him: ok, talk to you later.
later...
she: did you go to the store?
him: nope
she: oh if i would of know that i would of invited you over for dinner.
him: why didnt you invite me when we where talked earlier?
she: because you said you where going to the store. so, i did not ask you over for dinner because you had plans.
him: if i would of known the invitation was there i would of gone to the store after dinner.
both couples puzzled...
did the communication break down? if so, who broke it? him, her or both. and why?
I think both people screwed up here. No one was willing to elaborate on any of their ideas. This seems to be part of a conversation. Why didn't he ask "why, what are you doing this evening?" Why didn't she say something like "what are you doing before/after you go to the store?" Again, this seems like a part of a conversation with a whole lot of the inbetweens missing.
seems to me if she was thinking of asking you over for dinner. she would simple say, would you like to come over for dinner? and he would answer depending on what his plans are. yes i can do that or no thanks i have to go to the store or sure see you for dinner and i will go to the store after. but who cares what his plans are so why does she ask... you dont ask someone what are you doing if they plan to invite you over. so, i see it as her fault not his.
i still think she was wrong. she wanted to ask him over for dinner. but, rather than just ask him she first wanted to know if he had plans. he answered her question and there was no reason to ask why do you ask. it would be up to her to reply with, oh well i was going to invite you over for dinner and if your plans change let me know... he would have the opportunity to change or adjust his plans accordingly. again i believe she did not communicate well. why did he not communicate well?
who are these people thou??
friends, partners what??
Could it be the reason why she didnt ask him becuase she felt awkuared as he had plans already!
I dunno really, it all depends on the scenario of the people and whats there connection!
If they are a couple... then they have serious issues!
Life isn't really as complicated as these people make it out to me. It doesn't have to be a big drama at every turn. Here's a possible way it could turn out when two people are self-confident:
she: what are your plans for this evening?
him: i plan to go to the store and pu one item.
she: ok, i will talk to you later.
him: ok, talk to you later.
later...
she: did you go to the store?
him: nope
she: oh if i would of know that i would of invited you over for dinner.
him: why didnt you invite me when we where talked earlier?
she: because you said you where going to the store. so, i did not ask you over for dinner because you had plans.
him: if i would of known the invitation was there i would of gone to the store after dinner (which is a nice thing to say since it shows that she ranks higher than going to the store) her: ok I'll remember that for next time, do you want to pop over now? ... and so on like a regular couple starting out on the dating path
Yes i agree NK, she could have asked him that at the end to keep the conversation flowing!
Im glad to you said it to NK, about life isnt as complicated as they make it out to be, maybe some people like drame... who knows!
I mean relationships shouldnt be about pety arguements like this! If all couples argued about such issues then there would be no couples on this earth! One should not read so much into specifics of a conversation or what happened, but should plan a way to make it more clear and work better next time...
not "its your fault coz u said this" etc
Ok....blueiman, I think you just want to be right. I stand by my answer that both people screwed up. Please don't disagree with my opinion...my opinion can't be wrong, it's MY opinion. I did not say anything factually wrong.
How about because he didn't go any further. He didn't say, these are my plans...what are yours...he did nothing except answer her question. He didn't take it any initiative to go any further. Great conversationalist. I don't think there has to be a right or wrong. In relationships it is not important who is right or wrong. It's more important that both people try something different the next time.
Ok....blueiman, I think you just want to be right. I stand by my answer that both people screwed up. Please don't disagree with my opinion...my opinion can't be wrong, it's MY opinion. I did not say anything factually wrong.
Couldnt spread my love aqua, but i wanted to say i absolutely agree with your note, makes complete sense!
You are right.
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