We have a rocky relationship or what?

harriejansen · Jul 21, 2009, 09:33 AM

I have the feeling most of the people in this board are much younger. Me and my ex are 45 and 36. I have been married, divorced, 3 kids. She never married, 2 relationships of 5 years each.

We both are foreigners in the country we live in, and both work out of our homes. We fell in love 6 months ago, but are dealing with a lot of trust issues and get in unagreements, where she responds to ignoring me. That drives me nuts, and I then overreact by becoming angry, impacient etc.

After she broke up with me 2 times, now I broke up with her. I then explained my reasons to her in an email, but I put it like "here are some tips for your next relationship"

I am still very very much in love with her, but do not know what to do. I went NC a month ago, and now she sent me a mail about some work related issue (I am helping her exporting something of her company through an agent of mine)

What can I do? I know about the NC thing, but I think in this case it is really confusion, fear because of previous hurts (exes) etc.

Thanks for being here!

amicon · Sep 8, 2009, 11:00 AM

what next indeed?you ve tried two ways of communicating with her and neither got a response.she s moved on is my take on this.sorry.

harriejansen · Sep 8, 2009, 02:19 PM

She answered my mail: Hi, thanks for the info, regards, F

Now that is a short answer! Tomorrow I'll try to call again.

twomommyshell · Sep 8, 2009, 02:30 PM

there must be a reason there is trust issues. you must consider your partner when being in a relationship. trust is everything. giving up to easy is not good ether relationships take allot of work.

harriejansen · Sep 10, 2009, 11:55 AM

So far attempts to contact have been futile..... I feel OK anyway, doing a lot of sports etc.

Just sent her a sms: Hi I am in town these days maybe we can have a drink, would like to meet again

And she silent.... I drove past her house, she is in town, but what can I do?

amicon · Sep 10, 2009, 12:41 PM

not a lot the ball s in her court and either she gets in touch or she doesnt.its that simple.

harriejansen · Sep 11, 2009, 03:35 AM

Well, I have my answers! I tried to call her today, she didn't answer, so I called again and then sent her a message, please answer, she then sent me a message: what part of me not wanting to see you or talk to you do you not understand! And don't dare to come here because I will take measures.

????? Well, I needed this to be able to move on. I am flabbergasted really by so much agressiveness. Thanks guys!

amicon · Sep 11, 2009, 04:55 AM

there s your answer and now you can get your life back for real.all the best.

harriejansen · Sep 12, 2009, 06:12 AM

Wauw today I am having a really bad day.... it is true that contact sets you back...

I can still not grasp why she is so agressive, guess I shouldn't think about it and get myself back on my feet again, really hard today.

amicon · Sep 12, 2009, 06:29 AM

yes feeling the way you are today is understandable-thats why no contact is the best thing.I dont think dwelling upon how she feels is a good for you-hard as this sounds you should move on now.

N0help4u · Sep 12, 2009, 06:29 AM

Yeah that is why it is bad to contact it is merely a set back and accomplished nothing.
She may have felt she needed the aggressiveness to be assertive to make sure you got the message without question.



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