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Home > Family & People > Relationships   »   A Valentines day dream

 
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Old Feb 5, 2008, 10:41 PM
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A Valentines day dream

This isn't a question just something I wrote tonight while being down. I took from some personal experiences and some things I SHOULD have made personal experiences.
Hope you all like

A Valentines Day Dream

Good morning, sweetheart. I wanted to tell you I love you.
No, you don't have to get up. Just lie there for a few.
Yeah, something was burning. I tried making you breakfast.
Hey you! Don't laugh. I really did try my best.

No, I'm done. I ran over and got us some Denny's.
I stopped and got the syrup you like; we didn't have any.
You just relax and I'll go fix you a tray.
No, don't worry about it. Today is your day.

Here you go, love. Of course I got blueberry pancakes!
They are your favorite, for goodness sakes.
And yes, that's a real rose; I picked it on the way home,
But our neighbor might be mad. That's probably him on the phone.

Yes, I'm staring. I just love when you smile,
I was thinking we could go to the park, haven't been in a while.
A picnic? Yeah, that is a great idea, baby!
Yeah, I know we haven't gone out much lately.

Oh, of course I'll go and start the bath for you.
Just let me know when you are through.
Why? Because I want to ask you something.
What? Well, a few weeks ago I bought this ring...

Sorry. I'm nervous. I blew the surprise.
And no, it wasn't a quarter machine prize!
Here, let me put it on your finger. Hold it up. Let's see.
Oh God, I love when you smile! Will you marry me?

-Ernie


I dunno, to me that sounds like a great beginning to Valentine's Day, or really any day.

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Old Feb 6, 2008, 05:29 AM   #2  
imation
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that sounded so natural, i wish i could write lyrics like that aye... you'd be a good song writer wanna gimmie some tips??? haha but seriously
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Old Feb 6, 2008, 11:32 AM   #3  
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song? wow lol i thought i just wrote a poem.... thnx imation
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Old Feb 6, 2008, 11:56 AM   #4  
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Oh, Delow.... that brought tears to my eyes.

That is simply beautiful.

Absolutely perfect.

Simply idyllic.

You have a gift - thanks for giving us all a part of it.
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Old Feb 6, 2008, 12:13 PM   #5  
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That was so lovely, wish I was dat person lol!
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Old Feb 6, 2008, 12:32 PM   #6  
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Thnx guys, I dunno I just got in the mood to write, and wanted it to be a situation that showed an incredible amount of love in the simplest of ways. And that's what came out I'm glad you guys like it

and i wish i could meet that person that I could live that dream with lol
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Old Feb 6, 2008, 12:33 PM   #7  
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Focus on that star, darlin... you will.
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Old Feb 6, 2008, 12:36 PM   #8  
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I actually believe that HC

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HistorianChick agrees: I know you do. I've been incredibly blessed to have watched this process... its been amazing. You da bomb, Delow, you da bomb! ;)
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Old Feb 6, 2008, 08:42 PM   #9  
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I edited the poem, adding a line to finish the last stanza (that I got some help from wondergirl for the idea!) Thanks everyone who has givin me any kind of criticism and feedback!

I am glad so many people have liked this poem, some laugh and like it cause its cute, some tear up cus its sweet..... and when you have someone say "I dont know whether to laugh or cry" it makes you feel like you wrote something worth writing
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Old Feb 15, 2008, 05:13 PM   #10  
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Delow
You soppy sod :-) (Just kidding mate)
You sound like a perfect candidate to read "Suzannes Diary for Nicholas" what do you reckon HC?

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HistorianChick agrees: You only love me for my inner sappy-shakespearean-self, don't you, F4U?? ;)
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