Thanks for the advice.

Dear, where has your self-confidence gone? How long has this relationship been going on. You mentioned deployed, so you are probably a little scared of your current surroundings and trying to focus on all other negative things at the moment due to your fear. I well understand that we all fear things especially so far away from 'home'. Try and reflect back to when you two were together and had fun, how you met her in the first place and where. You must have found something about her outgoing attitude attractive or you would not be together now. The problem some of us have in a relationship is the thought of possession and then comes that little green monster (jealousy) even when it's not justified. Don't let that monster distract you at this point please. You need to try and be safe and get through this trial in your life. There is nothing you can physically do away from home right now, so put it on the 'back burner'. Your girlfriend just might need as many people (men and women) around her at this point so that she will not be stressed out worrying about you all the time - it's hard for her too. When I was and NCO's Wife, I did everything and anything to keep myself busy when my now ex-husband was deployed just to keep my sanity and take care of the baby. It was a long time ago, but the circumstances are probably still the same today. I can't say she's not cheating, but I can't say she is, but we all need a certain amount of freedom and not have the feeling of being 'possessed'. As long as you have not received news from her wanting to end this relationship, don't jump to conclusions, please. Her friends probably did not want her to feel like a 5th wheel and don't want her to be alone so much. If you really think that this is the right one for you, write her and tell her to not worry and enjoy herself and that you can't wait to get home to take her out and hold her again they way you did before. We all know what's going on and it is scarey, so let's all try to keep some good feelings inside too. Hope everything works out and all the best to you. Keep us posted.

You do not need to worry, if you will release yourself to Trust your beloved. Give her some credit and know that her affections are towards you... she seems to be a free spirit, which means that she loves interactions with various people for specific purposes... when it comes to he who has her heart, she will be faithful, unless you choose not to trust her. Accusation may anger her to the point of action; however, it does not constitute that she will. Trust her, above all, trust yourself. You can only give another, what you are willing to give unto yourself. You can't possibly desire her to change and become antisocial, depending solely on you for social stimuli. If you are willing to be honest with yourself, your frustration is a product of vain imagination... it is that unspoken male pride that assumes being disrespected when the object of your affection gives her attention elsewhere, when it should be directed towards you. You must know that no one person can give you everything you have need of; hence the various levels of friendships and relations.

I think you guys are right. I just really love her so much I couldn't stand the thought of her doing that to me. I just makes me angry to think that she could be doing that. She swears she isn't cheating and I am trying to put faith in her that she wouldn't want to destroy our 3 year relationship. I really think she is sincere. I love her more than any thing else in this world. I would give any thing for her. Thanks for bringing me to my senses.

Any time, and welcome. If you need someone to talk to outside of your sweatheart, just contact us. A 3-year relationship does not end that fast. Keep the trust and faith! Just make sure that when you communicate with her don't show signs of doubt so fast, OK?

Hi, I answered this post but for some reason it popped up under someone else's thread, oh well. Anyway all I can say is you should have a big discussion with her and find out what she really wants. She needs to be clear and honest with you, for both your sakes. I hope everything works out in the long run. P.S. if you want to read my whole post its under the thread-"touches himself" sorry about that I'm not sure what happened. :confused:

I think it's really sad when a guy automatically assumes that his girl is cheating on him because she goes out with FRIENDS. She obviously told you that she went out, and I think that if she wanted to cheat she wouldn't have said anything, you would not have known the difference. When you start questioning your other half for cheating, maybe you really need to look at yourself. Maybe you think she is cheating because of your own past wrongs and/or insecurities. If you have been with someone for three years, and you can't trust them just cause you are not there to watch them like a hawk, then you don't need to be in a relationship in the first place. Relationships are about trust, and respect. She is not your property so you can't tell her what to do, you just have to trust her. If you don't trust her, then you never loved her in the first place. Sorry to tell you this guy, but I think you need to do a little soul searching and find out what really matters to you... Her or your own selfish ego. By the way, next time you post, please proof read. The top part of your original post was missing before you erased it. Goodluck