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    I think my boyfriend broke up with me for his ex-girlfriend.

    Asked Jul 19, 2012, 03:26 PM ó 12 Answers
    We went out for 8 months. Everything was GREAT we were happy together, did everything together but he had this ex girlfriend who was apparently his first for everything and the broke up a month prior to us going out. He stopped talking to her and then she started calling a month into our relationship. I found out and told him that if he isnít ready to move on he should let me know now before I fall to deep. He exclaimed to me that he was over her multiple times.

    After that a few months later I found out he was text messaging her things that I wouldnít like of course, telling her he loves her and if him and I broke up would she get back with him. I called him out on it and he pleaded and begged for me not to leave him. He legit wrote me an essay expressing his love for me and admitting that it was hard to get over his ex but that he is completely done. Now during this time in our relationship he found out that his ex was talking to his best friend and he was pretty upset about it. Which I understand. So he stopped talking to her all together. She found a new boyfriend and me and him remained.

    Now the past week things started fading. His presence wasnít the same. We spoke about it and he said he wanted to take a break. I told him that I didnít want a break because they really donít fix a problem, its better if we talk it out. I told him I felt like the reason our relationship is fading is because we really havenít gotten a chance to spend alone time with each other. He said he hasnít had the urge so that couldnít be the problem, he told me he wanted to chill, no hold, and no anything just chill. I asked him if that means he wants to be single and he said "I guessĒ. I then told him OK. And he tried to hold conversation after.

    Then today he text me "hey" but I didnít respond. Now ironically his ex broke up with her boyfriend the day before him and I broke up. I heard her mom is planning a trip and being that his and her families are close since they were younger, his family is invited her, and he might be going so that means they're talking again.

    I need help, I feel terrible because I canít help but to think about how he just threw everything away. Do you guys feel that he and his ex are back at it?

    Last edited by talaniman; Jul 21, 2012 at 03:19 PM.
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    12 Answers
    Enigma1999's Avatar
    Enigma1999 Posts: 2,212, Reputation: 1072
    Welbeing Expert
     
    #2

    Jul 19, 2012, 03:38 PM
    Yes. They are still in love with each other. Unfortunately you were a rebound. A void.

    He used you for comfort, along with other things...

    Leave him alone. Find another worthy of you.
    Helpful (1)
    lovergirl123's Avatar
    lovergirl123 Posts: 8, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #3

    Jul 19, 2012, 03:48 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Enigma1999 View Post
    Yes. They are still in love with each other. Unfortunately you were a rebound. A void.

    He used you for comfort, along with other things...

    Leave him alone. Find another worthy of you.
    How could he still love someone who fckd his best friend that is mind bobbling & I keep thinking about all the stuff he did for me.. did he do that for comfort as well ? I guess you're right though, time to pick up and move on although something's just don't make sense. I wish I had verbal closer at least an explanation.
    Helpful
    Enigma1999's Avatar
    Enigma1999 Posts: 2,212, Reputation: 1072
    Welbeing Expert
     
    #4

    Jul 19, 2012, 04:49 PM
    Sometimes the best closure is to just let it be... You are young and will most likely go through many idiots before the right one comes along.
    Helpful
    lovergirl123's Avatar
    lovergirl123 Posts: 8, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Jul 19, 2012, 04:59 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Enigma1999 View Post
    Sometimes the best closure is to just let it be... You are young and will most likely go through many idiots before the right one comes along.
    Thankss!
    Helpful
    lovergirl123's Avatar
    lovergirl123 Posts: 8, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #6

    Jul 21, 2012, 02:15 PM
    What if he never texts back?
    Sooo my ex boyfriend broke up with me because he said things were "fading" in my previous post it's a but of our story.. I found out he didn't leave me for his ex because they don't even speak so I was just over thinking and over reacting buuuttt I need to know how to get him back. I've been reading around and people say ignore him and then he'll realize what he's missing. But since the break up he has only texted me once and I ignored him but that was 4 days ago and he hasn't txtd back yet. Knowing how he is, a person with much pride.. im afraid he won't ever text me back again.. I don't know what to do should I text him and tell him I want him back? Or if we can work things out? Or should I just wait for another text & then respond.. I don't know . Advice pleaseee?
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    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 47,049, Reputation: 10288
    Senior Family & People Expert
     
    #7

    Jul 21, 2012, 03:23 PM


    How did you find out they were not talking? Didn't he say they were? Text him, see what happens but prepare for the worst.

    Better yet, call.
    Helpful
    lovergirl123's Avatar
    lovergirl123 Posts: 8, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #8

    Jul 21, 2012, 03:27 PM
    Will ignoring my ex really get him back or will it push him away ?
    Sooo my ex boyfriend broke up with me because he said things were "fading" in my previous post it's a but of our story.. I found out he didn't leave me for his ex because they don't even speak so I was just over thinking and over reacting buuuttt I need to know how to get him back. I've been reading around and people say ignore him and then he'll realize what he's missing. But since the break up he has only texted me once and I ignored him but that was 4 days ago and he hasn't txtd back yet. Knowing how he is, a person with much pride.. im afraid he won't ever text me back again.. I don't know what to do should I text him and tell him I want him back? Or if we can work things out? Or should I just wait for another text & then respond.. I don't know . Advice pleaseee?
    Helpful
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 35,025, Reputation: 5104
    Jobs & Parenting Expert
     
    #9

    Jul 21, 2012, 03:45 PM
    Nope, ignoring doesn't work. Acting needy and pathetic don't work either. My advice is move on and heal from this relationship before you get into a new one (which will fail if you do it wrong and get into it too soon).
    Helpful
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 75,720, Reputation: 7217
    Expert
     
    #10

    Jul 21, 2012, 03:46 PM


    If it is over, then it is over and nothing gets him back.

    We always say no contact, not to get him back but to get over him. It is not to make him come back, it is to get over and move on.
    Helpful

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