My parents stayed together after my Dad molested my sister. Of course it was a different time and it was not reported. We all grew up loving each other and forgiving the flaws and we all grew to be normal productive citizens. Then I married a man who molested my daughter. I called social service, had him arrested, and divorced him. But the love I feel though changed has never died and my kids are all grown. Can a relationship after the fact still work? Is anybody out there trying it. This man tore my world apart once, I can not go through that again. Is anybody out there making it work?

meleenybabe

i know its a different situation but i was raped a couple months ago and i know if my mom ever got together with the monster who hurt me i would be a wreak. i cant even imagine what i would do if i had to see him again or know hes with my mom. you have to think how your child would feel. its really not worth it. no matter what situation your coming from, what he did was so incredibly wrong and your kid doesnt deserve that.

beenaroundtheblock

Wow! I never thought we would go all the places we have gone with this back on page 2 when I proded you for more information. I would like to say that I am sorry to BeenThere for not keeping up with every statment and from what I have just read from over the last few months you were given HELL. I am sorry for not informing you that I am an S.O. (sex offender) that has been through S.O.T.P. (sex offender treatment program) twice once in prison and then again when placed on parole which I have just finished in Sept. I learned a great deal in SOTP . One thing I learned was sexual assult is NOT always about sex it is mostly about power and control. In my treatment I have been give a great many tools that I can use to not reoffend and now that I have got off parole I can now go to a SOTP group any time free and will most likely do so in the future, time and again. In my case I did not get back in touch with the mother of the 15 year old that I assulted and have been told that is very hard to do. I have married again to a woman who knows my case and knew my PO. We have been married over 6 years now. She loves me very much and knows how to keep an eye out on me. I have neices that I have just spent Christmas Day with opening X-mas gifts. Before every one has a cow... our whole family knows I am a SO and no crime has been comited (4answeres!). We have a good life with few restrictions. Jobs are hard to come by, I dont think I will be going to work for the Girl Scouts or school any time soon. I say all this to Beenthere to let her know that I do know the subject to with she is talking about very much. AND I think your relationship should be pined on your daughter. If she dont mind and you love the man then do like my wife and become a chaperon through his SOTP group and learn how he will try and manipulate everyone If he is going to assult some one again. I bet if he spent any time in prison he knows he has to walk the straight and narrow for the rest of his life or will spend the rest of his life in prison. For me 5 and half years on a 15 got me to watch myself real good and my family watches me with the kids and I have had 14 years of SOTP. If you love him I mean really love him and your daughter dont care then who cares what all these people think. Real love only comes around just every once and a while better get some I got mine and THAT love is my strength to stay focused on whats right I thank God for her.

suess

I am divorced from an ex-child molester. My daughter was 9 years old when I discovered what I was married to. I understand your guilt for having any "love" left for the man. I still "love" my ex-husband like I would love a brother because he is the father of my children and I was married to him for 13 years. However, the thought of him touching me in a sexual manner brings on feelings of nausea.

Let me explain that the only reason this man can be called an "ex" child molester is because he is serving a life prison sentence. After I divorced him, he remarried and had 5more kids. His new wife was told that his "crazy ex wife" made that story about him up. When one of their children made an outcry, she still belived in him. The state took their children away and they fought the charges. A Tarrant County Jury convicted him of aggravated sexual assault of a child and sentenced him to life in prison. This is exactly where he needs to be. He was given a second chance after he molested our daughter. He went through several years of counseling. My point is, these men do not stop molesting ever unless they are put in a cage. He knew what kind of damage he was doing to his little girl but chose to go forward for his own selfish gratification.

N0help4u

You say Then you ask
why would you want to make it work?

Often people still have strong feelings for someone no matter how much they wronged them BUT you have to face the fact that they can not be trusted and it is best to keep your love at a distance and not get involved again unless you want to put yourself through more heartache and misery!