Like many others on here, my gf for 2 yrs broke up with me stating some small things that added up in the relationship, but said ultimately it was her desire to be on her own. I'm 25and shes about 2 years younger. It's been 2 weeks and my heart still aches. The initial couple of days after the break (up) she called to talk to see how I was doing and she stated she missed me. NOW, 2 weeks past we have had no contact except for seeing each other in 1 class. She recently stated that she doesn't care or think about what I am doing. That was hard to take, since you guys would have guessed, I'm missing her. I am trying to focus on myself and keeping myself busy.

For the most part, I am doing the NC thing, but what do I do in class? I figure I can try to be ok in front of her and avoid the subject completely, since she knows how I feel and doesn't care to talk about it.

Some other posts say that after some months of NC, the person who left the relationship misses the person. I dont want to give myself false hope, but how does this contact in class affect the breaking up and potential missing the other person process?

Sad Soul

I would say that 99 percent of the time the person who did the breaking up does indeed end up missing their ex, even if they initially said they don't really care. BUT you have to give her a CHANCE to miss you. This is done through NO CONTACT.

Don't worry and know that if she's not thinking of you right now, she will think of you later. BUT she will only think of you if you're worth something to think about. And this is how that happens:

Women like strong men. Women like men that shine despite them. You have to show that you are strong, mature and that you can be happy with her, but also happy without her. This is called, "bringing out the best of you". And why not? Nothing's better than offering the best of you to the world, and the woman that you'll date (whether it's your ex or someone new).

I'm not talking about being mean to her or being rude to show you've moved on, but to be indifferent to her. This means you have to be polite if she says hi or if she ever calls, but for the love of the world, NEVER CONTACT HER!

Take this time apart to work on all the things you need to fix. This break is a bit of a blessing, because now that you two are apart, and you are "solo" it shows that you are not as strong as you should be.

Hence, you have to work on being positive, work on getting focused, maybe start setting some goals like saving money, working out, and doing everything that makes a man of steel when you are just "by yourself". This break is a way of life telling you to work on you.

At first this will be very hard, but eventually with practice, things become easier. You have to, even if it kills you, practice not thinking about her. Set tiny goals each day so that you can at least achieve them. Doing a little something each day will keep you moving away from the past, and forward by inches. You don't have to jump into feeling okay and healthy again just yet, but you have to try.

Good luck.

needofhelp

Thanks Sad Soul. I will maintain the NC, with the exception in class together. It will be hard, but it's somewhat easier and sadder thinking that she doesn't care about me and that she's happier being independent. She's the one who said she's happier on her own. I guess the scary thing is that she's on her own and will find someone else. Before anyone responds to the last sentence, I know if she finds someone else, then it wasn't meant to be. It just pains me to think I will be replaced, but it can happen.

It's one of those times to man up.

talaniman

Many here say NO CONTACT makes the dumpers miss you, and that may be true, its hardly ever enough to rekindle a relationship. The time to be missed is during the relationship, not after. Your ex is not in shock and confusion, as you are, so its important you heal. Get busy making youself happy, and that will ease the pain of having to see her in class. Like all things it takes time and HARD work.