Okay so, I hope that someone on here can help me....I broke up with my boyfriend of 2 years in late september, I still loved him, but I was so busy with trying to pass all my classes so I can graduate and I had a lot of extra curricular activities I was busy with. Now 3 months later, I cut down on some of my activities and I feel that I have adequate time for him. I am very shy and I do not know if he has moved on...I think that he believes that I have though...I really dont know what to do about this. Its just killing me inside. He treated me so well, and I really miss him...please help me!

Jiser

Speak to him face to face or ring him and tell him. Explain how wrong you were, how you made a mistake etc and don't expect anything in return.

aiyerrc

tell him how you feel, but as jiser said, dont expect the fairy tale get back together story...if u "love" him, the fact that you are busy isnt a very weak excuse to break up with someone if thats the only reason. when you approach, dont try to justify why u broke up with him, and for god sakes dont say you have "time" for him now, bc then as soon as u get busy again, he will get scared.

just tell him straight up you made a mistake and want him back...dont beat around the bush...telling him bluntly how you feel, with no icing on the cake. that is how guys communicate with each other, so he will understand it that way the easiest. if he asks you what happened the first time, tell him you didn realize how much you needed him until you didnt have him anymore, and it took me 3 months of not being with you for me to realize that i want to be with you, if that makes any sense

good luck!!!

George_1950

You broke up with him and you love him. Better call him soon.

Santi

if you are putting energy toward something, it's usually a good idea to understand why.

Chery

Maybe I'm strange, but to me it sounds as if you placed him on the shelf because you were busy with other things - like a toy.

Don't you give him enough credit to understand that you had other priorities and would have been man enough to catch on, or did you think he might have gotten jealous and stressful in the time you didn't need it.
What, if you got back together, will you do the next time you have other priorities?

You said you were together for 2 years... how together? Did you talk to each other and get to know how each of you would react in certain situations, or was it just on a physical intimacy?

Hope this works out the way you want, but if not, try and be a little less selfish and more mature and communicative in the future.

Happy Holidays!

MissingHim2Much

You broke up with him and broke his heart. It's completely up to YOU to get in touch with him. Tell him straight up how you feel and that you want to get back together. None of this " I was just wondering how you are" or anything like that. TELL HIM THE TRUTH so he's not confused or wondering if you have an agenda.

talaniman

I disagree with the others. You don't love him, but he is on your mind, since now you have time. If he has moved on, good. You are not ready for a relationship, since its only a priority when you have nothing else to do. Leave him alone and examine your own feelings, motives, and actions.

Chery

Darn it, was told to 'spread it again'...

Tal, it seems as if you and I sometimes ride the same flying carpet or are on the same wave-length that it's ironic. I can imagine us looking down while riding and having identcal thoughts. Way to go 'pard'!

4answers

In relationships the person that we desire and have feelings for, becomes of high value to us and therefore we want to be with this person, spend time with them etc....

As the relationship goes and the emotional attachment we have with this person weakens then other things in our lives become of higher value than this person. Spending time with family, friends, career, study etc.....

However sometimes when we have committed ourselves to these other things and do not have the positive emotional benefits of being in a relationship, we begin to miss these things. Affection, attention, love etc. This is value reversal for relationship benefits.

Now since the last person to give us these was our ex, then it reasonable for us to assocaite missing these benefits with missing the ex !
However its not the ex that we are missing, but the being in a loving relationship.

If your feelings for your ex were strong, studies would not of changed things. You would of studied whilst he was there reading a book. You would of wanted him there.

So you need to really look at, is it him you miss or the being with someone.

Remember love is: Not finding someone you can be with, but finding someone you cant be without. And girl, you can be without him or you would not of even considered being apart let alone actually doing it !