first off, thank you to anyone who reads this, it is greatly appreciated.

i dated this guy for a year, and we broke up about a month ago. he was an amazing boyfriend--everything i've ever wanted and more, but because he spoiled me so much... i kinda took him for granted (which i didn't realize untill now). for the last few weeks i was way too belligerent and didnt give him enough space. i didnt treat him right. we spent way too much time together and it was my fault for demanding it. he was so amazing, and when we first broke up i thought it wasnt going to be a big deal, or it wasnt going to be permanent... so we decided to stay friends.

somehow he still loves me, thought i was a great girlfriend, and desires me (i know this because he's called me sobbing about it at late hours of the night, saying how he can't sleep, the whole deal)... but he's scared to commit again. he's afraid and confused because he thinks i'm the same dependent person--I AM NOT!

i've learned so much this past month about everything i did wrong and about myself, and i want to TREAT HIM RIGHT! please, i don't need a lecture about how i should get over him or how it's my fault--i just want him back. i love him with all my heart, and unfortunatly it took until now to realize how much he meant to me. we are both miserable as "friends", we're trying to force a friendship in when we both know its not right. I AM SICK OF PRETENDING!! sometimes he even acts like everything is fine, but every few days he'll give in and start crying or something like that . (i know he's not fine) i don't want to move on, or get over him. i want to prove to him who i am and that he CAN be happy with me... i don't want to "get back together" i want to start a new relationship! please, how do i prove that to him? flowers? surprises? i was thinking about telling him how i feel then giving him a week or a few weeks of us not talking to get some space and think about it before we hook up or anything again. is that a good idea? i don't even want to jump right back in, i just want him to CONSIDER "us" again because i know how happy we'll be. i'll do anything...

thank you so much to anyone for the help, i'm desperate (sorry it's so long)

talaniman

Its real simple , tell him how you feel and what you want and see what he says.

s_cianci

I think that telling him how you feel then giving him time to respond is your best bet. Don't pressure him but be honest and upfront about how you feel.

chuff

Make him dinner. Take him somewhere fun. Do something for him for a change. It sounds like he did everything for you, try being, nice back to him. Of course he's scared. He gave everything, you took everything, and now your promising change but your not showing him any.