Hi there people im a new user and i need some answer i had a relationship with a guy for 5yrs we broke up 7months ago but continue with a on and off relationship now its getting to the point where i dont want that anymore i still get i love you,i miss you i really do want to be with you but there just words and i said that they come cheap and actions speak louder so when i say prove he says he will be never does we do have disagreements and most time they turn into arguements but there so little it annoys me so much,so anyway my ex cant make a committment and we havnt spoken in days my questions are,

1)Has he moved on for good?
2)Does he love me?
3)How do i win him back?
4)If he calls me do i play hard to get?

Thank you xox

megan321

ok so i know exactly how you feel only im knocked up lol.
5 years is a long time. just think about it this way are you sadder when your without him or more stressed when your with him? it just depends on how it wieghs. and dont worry about the fighting sweetie every one fights, getting through them is what makes us stronger.

JBeaucaire

You are right. Actions speak louder than words, or even better..."Only go with the actions."

So, based on that and discounting anything that is said to you, I believe you can answer your questions pretty easily:

1)Has he moved on for good? No, you keep letting him drift back and cause you (each other) more needless grief. You two NEED to move on for good, but you're treating each other like a bad habit that can't be kicked.

2)Does he love me? Since we ignore words and go with actions, the most accurate answer...no, not really. But he IS used to talking to you. That's not love, that's habit.

3)How do i win him back? (*Sigh*) How do you win back full-time a guy that makes you miserable? What a great goal. OK, call him and tell him it doesn't matter how he treats you, what he does, whether he stays faithful or not, what he does to you emotionally, ANYTHING...tell him you will be his girl and let him do whatever he wants any time he wants. That should do it. Won't that be a fun relationship?

4)If he calls me do i play hard to get? (*sob*) You can't trick him into being a better match for you than he is. You "might' trick him into giving you more of this wonderful quality time (sarcastic tone), but you gain nothing long term, except misery.

Your off/on relationship now is just booty-call time, probably for both of you, so don't blame him, you're doing it, too.

He has definitely turned his serious attentions elsewhere, you've just kept the door open to let him "release" every now and then. That is and will be the total of your relationship for as long as you let it.

4)If he calls me do i play hard to get? (Part 2) YES!!! You should play IMPOSSIBLE to get...impossible to get on the phone, on the IMs, and absolutely impossible to get in bed. Get serious with your life. You will always like this guy, but SO WHAT? After 6 years it's got you HERE, asking strangers how to make him love you more than he does.

It isn't going to happen. Enjoy your memories of him, but go make some new memories with a guy who may just be looking for a girl to give his all to. It ain't this old guy.

BaByGaL3

Ok hi everyone,
well im inlove and have been for 5yrs with this most amazing and wonderful guy the only thing is we split up last july (7months ago) till now and well over that hard and horrible 7moths we have had contact nearlly every week or every month how ever it turns out and well hes never once said i dont want to be with you, its always been me bcos i want a PERMANENT relationship he agrees but no actions happen on his behalf i always get I LOVE YOU i MISS YOU but there words to me and words come cheap and he knows thats how i feel, sooo back again he hasnt spoken to me in 5days after we had a disagreement whats going on with him i received a $300 necklace for my birthday which was in nover and we were on and off then i know he loves me but i had waiting around and looking at my phone and getting disappointed but i WANT MY EX BF BACK!!!

why hasnt he called?
has it been all lies?


i know he speaks to his mum about us/and our relationship and she even told me we are meant to be bcos we always come back to each other but then something clicks then BAMM back to normal no contact again. Last week he even wanted a fresh start and for me to move back in with him,whay say that then not contact me after our disagreement for 5days.

Should i play hard to get and not give in to him im sick of being a puppet on a string but he knows and thinks ill always be there when he wants/calls.

all advise please what should i do. NO IM NOT GOING TO MOVE ON/GET OVER HIM!!
Its too hard!

Marriedguy

Why don’t people leave out important information? What did you originally break up for?

I don’t know what is going on with your ex-boyfriend and I don’t think you should be waiting around to find out.

Real men are very assertive if they want something they go out and try to get it. It seems to me that you are sending out the signal that you are ready for the taking and he is not coming over that and taking you.

You are getting mixed signals which mean he has doubts about being with you.

What was this disagreement about that made him stop calling you? There could be something in that which turned him off.

talaniman

Then he will keep making you miserable, and if thats love to you, Hope you enjoy it, and quite complaining. Otherwise wake up, and disappear from his life, and get one that makes you happy.

starbuck8

I broke your question down to key words/partial sentences. Read it that way and see how it sounds to you. Does that sound like someone that loves and misses you? Mature love requires trust and respect, and it seems that neither of you have either of those things for each other. If you love someone, you don't just call 'once a week or month' or so!

You answered your own question in your last 2 lines. He isn't calling you on a regular basis because you are LETTING HIM treat you like a puppet on a string! He knows that you will be there, and he can get away with almost anything. You said that "no I'm not going to move on" and he absolutely knows that!!

If you keep on letting him call the shots, you are in for a whole lot of heartbreak girl. You sound like you are young, so you have plenty of time. Move on and find a guy who wants to call you back the minute he hangs up the phone, and just can't wait to see you everyday! DON'T settle for Mr. "whenever I feel like it"!! Trust me, you'll be alot happier if you do. If you don't, well all I can say is good luck to you.

BaByGaL3

Thanks but its not COMPLAINING i asked a question and i wanted a answer and i got it from people in my situation THANKS but dont answer then next time.

talaniman

If there is a next time, then you learned nothing from this experience, and your welcome anytime.

BaByGaL3

Haha typical answer coming from like yourself what does your life involve coming on here all day and night checking to see if your answers were any help well there NOT!! hahaha your welcome to lovley xoxo kmfa!