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eazy123 · Apr 3, 2007, 10:37 PM

I have a girl FRIEND not girlfriend just friend. I've known her for a few years, and I'm not that good of friends to girls, I mean if I don't actually like them ill just kind of ignore them basically but I'm really starting to fall for my friend and just recently I started really looking in her eyes when she talkes and now I sit as close to her as I can without physically touching she don't move, she might even move closer like always.Its like I can make her laugh what ever I say, BUT she has a boyfriend and when I'm with her alone she always talkes about how bad he treats her or how jealouse he is or she just harshly flirts with me but not how you think, its all talk flirt,I take her quading lots and stuff like that,Its like her boyfriend shows off to me that he treats her bad,another thing she looks at me lots then looks away sometimes,sometimes she'll keep looking for a minute then look away then look back and just stare in my eyes, no matter how far away we are from each other in the room she'll lean towards me, she always fiddels with anything she can when she's talking to me.

I just want to know what everyone think's I want your real opinion how you think it's going what I should do, anything... And trust me this isint over.

theprodigy06 · Apr 4, 2007, 03:07 PM

At this point the only thing you really can do it just sit tight. You've already entered the "friend" phase and unless you're looking to end the friendship between you two just play it cool. Play around with her but always insist that its just a joke. Also really helps when you don't say the F word around her. No not the cuss word but do your best to never refer to the f word. Even when you're talking about your own friends. From now on, its my boy this, homegirl that, friend isn't even a part of your dictionary.

Tread carefully, one little mistake and you could end up destroying your great friendship.

Lowtax4eva · Apr 4, 2007, 05:08 PM

Agreed, you're her friend, she won't ever consider dating you seriously. She likes being able to complain about her problems with you. She might be really relaxed around you and your taking this as little hints that she likes you but she's just being herself.

I would say tell her how you feel and risk never seeing her or just accept you have a good female friend and go on with life.

eazy123 · Apr 4, 2007, 09:59 PM

Originally Posted by theprodigy06

at this point the only thing you really can do it just sit tight. you've already entered the "friend" phase and unless you're looking to end the friendship between you two just play it cool. play around with her but always insist that its just a joke. also really helps when you dont say the F word around her. no not the cuss word but do your best to never refer to the f word. even when you're talkin about your own friends. from now on, its my boy this, homegirl that, friend isnt even a part of your dictionary.

tread carefully, one little mistake and you could end up destroying your great friendship.

U mean like words that start with F??

HipHipHooray · Apr 5, 2007, 02:43 AM

I'm pretty sure he means 'friend'

Maybe so as not to get himself classified as a friend. Since it's "hard to break the barrier of 'friend' once your there"

(as many American teen movies will tell you)

greeneyedgirl · Apr 5, 2007, 06:53 AM

What does she fink about u?? If she lykz you mre den a mate and al den why don't she dump her boyfriend and go owt with u? Because he is treating her bad x

theprodigy06 · Apr 5, 2007, 09:44 AM

Originally Posted by eazy123

u mean like words that start with F???

No I'm just saying don't say "friend" too often. Your best bet is to leave her questioning the relationship you guys share. The more you refer to her as your friend, and use the word friend around her, the more she'll feel secure in a friendship.

You already made up your mind you're trying to go places with this girl. So leave her a trail of crumbs, if she's curious she'll follow.

Lowtax4eva · Apr 5, 2007, 10:14 AM

Or if you start acting weird around her she may distance herself from you if she starts feeling uncomfortable. Remember, she's in a relationship, as much as she may complain about the guy, she likes him enough to stay together.

Just be there to talk to her and if/when they breakup maybe start trying to see her a bit more and see where it goes, but don't be pushy or she'll leave.

Above all, as said before, she sees you as a friend, don't expect that to ever change. See if she can hook you up with someone!

eazy123 · Apr 5, 2007, 01:18 PM

Originally Posted by Lowtax4eva

Or if you start acting weird around her she may distance herself from you if she starts feeling uncomfortable. Remember, she's in a relationship, as much as she may complain about the guy, she likes him enough to stay together.

Just be there to talk to her and if/when they breakup maybe start trying to see her a bit more and see where it goes, but dont be pushy or she'll leave.

Above all, as said before, she sees you as a friend, dont expect that to ever change. See if she can hook you up with someone!

Thanks this helps a lot! But anything els?

theprodigy06 · Apr 5, 2007, 01:45 PM

Originally Posted by eazy123

thanx this helps alot! but anythin els??

There's no need to overthink things, you're really stuck in a position that you can't dig yourself out of.

That's like rule #1, is to keep friendship out of the picture. Doesn't mean don't be there friend, but once a friendship is formed, its hard to head down another path.

What I would personally do in this situation, is bring it up but be really careful. If you're the kind of guy that can pass this over in the case of rejection and your friend knows it, then its cool give it a shot.

If you're going to start acting weird and pour out all your feelings to this girl, save your breath and your time. Be real soft with your approach and choose your words carefully. Don't say anything that'll make the girl think too hard.

Lowtax4eva · Apr 5, 2007, 01:48 PM

I don't know, I have been friends with many girls and only once did it turn into a relationship. But at the time we weren't close (as friends), in most cases once you become really close friends with a girl your not dateable to her.

I recently admitted to a close female friend that I had a thing for her a few years back, for one reason or another I just stopped thinking of her as girlfriend material so I didn't mind telling her. She was surprised but said she never felt the same.

I guess remain friends and if you can never let go of wanting to be with her, tell her and see what happens. But most likely eventually you will accept how things are and move on and be happy

talaniman · Apr 5, 2007, 02:26 PM

She is in a relationship and not a good one, so you say, so she may see you as a friend, and I advise you not to expect any more than that. Once you cross that line it will never be the same friendship again. Accept it and keep things in there proper perspective. Even if she breaks up it will be a long time before she is ready for another relationship so I wouldn't hold out any hope for anything with her . Better to back off a bit and make sure you have a life you already enjoy without her.

eazy123 · Apr 5, 2007, 10:49 PM

Originally Posted by talaniman

She is in a relationship and not a good one, so you say, so she may see you as a friend, and I advise you not to expect any more than that. Once you cross that line it will never be the same friendship again. Accept it and keep things in there proper perspective. Even if she breaks up it will be a long time before she is ready for another relationship so I wouldn't hold out any hope for anything with her . Better to back off a bit and make sure you have a life you already enjoy without her.

Well how do would u know the person in the first place if u isn't half friends

talaniman · Apr 6, 2007, 05:13 AM

well how do would you know the person in the first place if you isn't half friends

Once you get to friend zone its hard to get romance going. It's a lot different to get to know someone through dating, than just knowing each other as buddies for a while. Not impossible but unlikely. Females love romance and mystery. This is not written in stone, but usually that's how it works.