[TrueFaith]

OD MY nerve/pain tranquilizers

I hope that was a joke..
And if it was.. not a very a funny one.


Love.. is just a word..

We love the person we are with yes..
But what we love so much more.. is How they make us feel
The feeling of warmth they give us
That tender feeling.

So love should be an action that makes someone feel good.. right?

From what I read.. neither of you got the point of that.

2 Options

1 Work on your own issues, and what's done is done.. try and move on.. to a new life together.
Or
2 Split with him go no contact. Work on yourself and try and find someone that makes you feel warm and special

There are people out there.. that would make even the most self conscious person feel loved.

I hope you make the right choice.

Love is a wonderful thing, if both partners work at it together.

It can be a nightmare if both partners are not working at it, because all that is left then, is fear.. doubt and need.

[dynocompe]

I don't understand how a person so self conscious can cheat? Don't you think you cheating on him can have the same affect it has on you? Possible he feels the same way and was shattered to hear when you cheated on him. All he did was put ideas in your head that shattered your thoughts, but you actually acted on your thoughts and went through with the cheating...

[Gemini54]

Just quietly, I believe that you're sabotaging the relationship and then justifying it with psycho-babble.

He tells you that he still loves an ex and you make it the reason NOT to commit. You use this to blame him for shattering your self-esteem, and then you justify your 'fragile' state by having an affair.

You also blame him for destroying your sanity and self esteem.

Wake up. You did this to yourself. You made the choices.

I apologize for being harsh, but you seem to be blaming others for your state of mind and your actions and not taking responsibility.

I strongly suggest counseling would be helpful to get a perspective on yourself and strengthen you self-esteem, particularity if you're taking medication and are thinking of OD'ing.

[neverme]

Time to leave, you already have one foot out the door. You are not helping yourself or him by staying in a relationship you feel is over.

[Cat1864]

This needs to be merged with j_ely's other threads on the same subject:

Her threads were merged-MOD.

I still think that your relationship needs to end. The thread I linked to is only a portion of what you have been through with this person.

[talaniman]

I think Cats right, while there was a lot of physical pleasures, I really don't think there was enough to bond with this person, so maybe the lust is finally wearing off enough for you to realize, he ain't the one to sustain your highly emotional needs, and you want to move on so, DO SO! Just be honest about it!

[jmw0713]

Sadly this type of thing happens all the time...

[Gemini54]

I just read through most of the merged threads and it all seems so incredibly complex. Why have you made this SUCH hard work?

It reads like it was one issue after another - even to the point where this man didn't like your hair.

You chose to stay and to allow him to wear away at your fragile sense of self.

In fact the answer is quite simple - the only way to feel better about this situation and about yourself is to remove yourself from it.

Your lives are not so intertwined that you can't separate. So just do it.

Don't you want to feel better?

[AmericanGirl01]

Wow, it sounds you like have some major self esteem issues. He is bringing out some major insecurities within yourself.

I don't think you should be in this relationship anymore. Take a step back and figure out how to love yourself first.