[KingZo66]

My girlfriend of 3 1/2 years cheated on me. Im so hurt and so disgusted, she did everything we do. He got the love that was supposed to be mine.. But I don't want to leave. See, she was a virgin when we first me, and I took her virginity. I've been wit 5 girls in my life, including her, and these past couple of months we've been talking about engagement and what we going to do when she graduates this year. Out of nowhere she begins telling me how its not fair that she's only been with one person and if we get married then it'll be just one for the rest of her life. I told her, I told her it doesn't matter how many people u've been with, it only matters if you love the person that you are with. I know its not all her conjouring up this ridiculousness, her slutbag friends put this in her head. Well Saturday I was supposed to go down her way for a party but my ride fell through, keep in mind I'm the love of the life (supposedly) and before she cheated she used to always say "i jus dont understand how u can have sex with somebody and not love them" so I never really worried about her cheating. Anyway the ride fell through and she and her friend who was driving wouldn't come get me, so my fone died. Well I got home around 1 and I was calling and calling and her fone was ringing, so I called the friends fone and she was like she dropped her fone in mud and it was off and she didn't have service. So I was like OK, I asked where she was, she told me at her house. Well I was thinking and I was like "yo if her fone was off why is it still ringin instead of goin str8 to voicemail???" the next day she tells me she stayed the night at one of my homies house and had sex with him. Man it hurt so bad, I threwup I cried, still crying, didn't eat, I'm hurt to my core. She says she loves me, but it isn't fair she only had one person, We broke up. She said she didn't want to hurt me but she wanted to do it. She said she's feels horrible for hurting me but not for doing it. I love her with every fiber of my being, but this was wrong, very very wrong. And no matter how much I cry, and hate her. I love her. I don't want to leave, I know she can change because I know her, but if she loved me how could she do that, she even gave him head, dude went raw. I feel so sick, but I love her so much. I'm so confused. She called me yesterday and was like we can't talk because I'm hurting you when I talk to you and I agreed. But then 4 hours later she called like "i can't do it, i can't not talk to u". I don't want her to think that I'm OK with this. I know she knows I love her, she doesn't know I don't want to leave and I refuse to tell her because she deserves to suffer for this. Is me talking to her even though we not together saying that she can do whatever she wants to me and ill be OK wit it? I don't want her thinking that. She did something very selfish but she is such an essential part of my life, I'm such an essential part of her life. She says when he was done he rolled ova and went to sleep and she was upset because she didn't fall asleep on his chest, not because it was him, because she always does that with me. I told her he doesn't love her and he hasn't even called or texted her since that night. She says she doesn't want to be together right now because she can't trust herself. I didn't even ask to get back together with her yet. We haven't even talked in person yet. But I know when I see her I'm going to cry because I love her so much, I would die for this girl, I really think she's just young and confused right now, I think she can change, but I know if she does this again I'm gone as a friend and as a potential mate. Im so confused, my feelings of hatred flare inside me like a fire in my heart but an hour later after I can cry no longer, the feeling of love blossoms like the flowers of a rose garden. She is so so wrong, but this love, something about it, makes me want to stay. Help me.

[mafiaangel180]

If she says she can't even trust herself. How can you?

Seriously, don't even put yourself through this. Leave her alone. She didn't love you too much when she was doing all this.

You can find better. Trust me. You are sooo much better than her. You deserve way better.

[Synnen]

She doesn't even regret it.

THAT right there is a sign that she's being stupid.

Don't call her, don't talk to her, don't communicate in any way. No matter how much you love her, the fact that she's not sorry she did it says more than the words "I love you" coming out of her mouth.

I have no words of hope for you... the only way I can see you working this out with her is if there is a 3rd party moderator involved--a relationship counselor, a pastor, a priest, SOMEONE qualified to help you work through this together.

Sounds like your friend is an a$$ too--I'd drop HIM from your life as well.

[talaniman]

You both are so young and immature. She clearly would rather explore and experiment, so let her. As hard as this is for you, you must cut all contact. Your emotions need to heal so you can think clearly again, and I can tell you it will take a long time to get over what your immature ex has done to you. A long time. Right now she has life and BS, all screwe up and you cannot trust if she will get wonderlust again, and she still isn't sorry. Get out of her life. Or get more hurt. Up to you.