[klynnm]

Wow. I was in your Same situation two years ago. 6 years. No ring. Embarressed, ashamed, jealous of all my friends. It was horrible. One day I woke up, literally out of the blue, called Mr. Wasted Six Years of My Life and said, "Hey, I'm not coming over today. In fact, I'm very unhappy, and it's over." I was estatic for a couple of days, then... well... then I cried for about six months. But I DID get over it. You have to realize sweetheart that he either doesn't want to get married, or doesn't want to marry you. If you meant anything significant to him he would marry you because that's what you want. I know many guys who weren't too interested in getting married but did anyway because they simply wanted to be with their girlfriend for the rest of their life. And if marriage is what she wanted, so be it.

I am with someone else now, it's been a year and a half, and I'm hitting 29 in six months. And I rather die than go for more than two or three years without an engagement ring. I learned the hard way. There is nothing wrong with wanting to get married. In fact, there are many men who want to get married too. Dump your "boyfriend" and find someone who wants the same things in life as you do. It will suck, and hurt like hell, but in the end, it's probably the best thing you ever did for yourself.

Free yourself from marathon relationship prison!

[stick_labuf]

The part that I understand in this situation is the pressure to get married from family. I come from a very large immediate family (talking double digits in siblings) and was in a relationship where I was asked about marriage all the time. I would put on a smile tell a joke about not needing to because I wasn't "knocked up yet", and eventually started lying to them and saying we were looking at rings just to get them off my back. I'd go home and take it out on by guy and nag about when it was going to happen... just to get it over with. Truth was I wasn't ready (wanted to be more financially sound, finish grad school, and do some traveling). I just wish I had the backbone to communicate that to my family. It took a toll on my well-being and that of my relationship. Make sure your unhappiness is about the relationship and no outside forces are making up your mind for you. I wish I had looked at and enjoyed hat I had in stead of being obsessed with what I didn't.

[margod]

Dear Brandy,

I understand you a lot first real love that its hard to go over it but be wise how long will you continue to hate the person you love. You don't want to leave him because you are afraid to finish alone , you can be happy with some other guy don't be stupid if you are waisting your time stop. Start dating with someone else and see if there is no gealosy. But if you want to see in which sep you will want to go over an over again start to Take action sit down with him if necessary tigh him up with a rope on chair and switch of the t.v. or brake the controler ,ask him if he is not going to commit and than if he says yes give him a time limit of 6 months if he says no then for sake leave him show him the door and take your key and no matter how many times he will beg you to come back don't give other chance .He is using you to have a place where to stay to , he is afraid to live a lone ( in mature where are his parents travelling ) and the thought that there is someone (a serv) sorry to say so he will never leave. If a person really but really loves you no matter how you look fat , slim , ugly , beautiful , dirty or clean he would marry you one way or another.


He is 38 for god sake will you wait till he is 76 years old and if he is not mature now you think that a star will fall open his eyes and tell him( dear child you have been acting not very well thess past years start acting mature) NOOOOOOOO!! He will stay Un mature . Another thing if you sleep with him once in a while it means that he don't seem to care much to have sex with you . Don't you think that maybe while you are there crying in the corner washing the plates he might be with some other girl . Wake up sweetheart don't let him use you . There is a differnce between Love and acting in love. You know what I think that you are much younger than he is and he just thinks that he can use you as much as he wants . What if one day you get preagant with mistake will he take reponsability or he will just lay on the sofa watching your TELE.

You want to see if he really is in love with you have sex with him make him go crazy and than take distance .Don't talk to him fake that you are vomiting after a month you slept with him . And than buy a pregnancy test Ask someone a friend of your s how might be preagnant to do the test instead of you . Go home make the test 9btw keep the box) leave the test on the sink throw away the box in th bin of the toilet leave it where it can be seen . And than after you make sure that he sees it see what his action will be .

But in my opinion he will just lay down watching the tele and say what the hack I told her I don't want kids she wants them she keeps them... don't act stupid girl. Go back home the family is always the family and they love you with or without him maybe more without him. It might be the reason why your family keeps asking you when will you get married so that they make YOU realize that he is not the one for you..

Love take care and don't distroy your love and life for someone who don't really are