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    elle11zee's Avatar
    elle11zee Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    May 3, 2009, 12:31 PM
    I don’t want to regret things again
    It’s been 2months since my boyfriend and I broke up. He actually dumped me. At that time, I panicked. It’s been really hard on my part because it’s a long distance relationship. Like the other girls would do, I began chasing, begging, pleading, phoning, e-mailing, IMing him but, he refused. After a few days, he emailed me and told me that I haven’t been supportive to him, I strangled him a lot, he doesn’t need a girl like me and he needs space. It’s so confusing. I can’t imagine why he told me those stuffs when he urges me to communicate, update, convey on him time after time. I was very upset. I loved him so much, we planned our future and we’re about to get married as soon as he get back from his assignment. What I rue most is the loss of our friendship. I knew him for a long time before dating him. Its significant but it all just ended screwed up…

    Although everything’s been very difficult, I command myself to forget him as if nothing happen. It’s tough but I have to let go. Exercise and practice again the things I used to do without him. Keep telling myself that there is no way to connect with him again. As time goes by, everyday get slowly better.

    The issue now is, lately he’s disconcerting me. He’s trying to make friends with me and message me sometime. I can’t hide and deny the fact that I still have feelings for him and I’m not over of him yet. And, it really hurts me so bad because I don’t understand what he’s trying to do. I don’t want to regret things again. If I could do the right thing, it’ll be a big relief.
    ylaira's Avatar
    ylaira Posts: 1,193, Reputation: 118
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    #2

    May 3, 2009, 01:50 PM

    Are you asking us here if it's OK to respond?

    Just ask once what does he want. If he says he just want you to be friends, forget it.
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
     
    #3

    May 3, 2009, 03:21 PM

    See what his intentions are for communicating with you again. If he doesn't want to get back together, then you need to block him out of your life, because it's just going to cause you pain if you still talk to him while still having feelings for him.

    No contact, wait until you stop having feelings for him, then you can be friends again.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #4

    May 3, 2009, 04:22 PM

    At some point you will have to stop all contact with him, friends, or otherwise, just so you can heal, and put your life back in order. The sooner, the better.
    elle11zee's Avatar
    elle11zee Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    May 4, 2009, 03:02 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by ylaira View Post
    Are you asking us here if it's ok to respond?

    Just ask once what does he want. If he says he just want you to be friends, forget it.
    Doesn't it sound "needy" to man when I asked him that way even just once?
    elle11zee's Avatar
    elle11zee Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #6

    May 4, 2009, 03:15 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by I wish View Post
    See what his intentions are for communicating with you again. If he doesn't want to get back together, then you need to block him out of your life, because it's just going to cause you pain if you still talk to him while still having feelings for him.

    No contact, wait until you stop having feelings for him, then you can be friends again.
    I'll take your advice. Can you give me any idea what kind of strategy would I do to know his intentions?
    elle11zee's Avatar
    elle11zee Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    May 4, 2009, 03:17 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman View Post
    At some point you will have to stop all contact with him, friends, or otherwise, just so you can heal, and put your life back in order. The sooner, the better.
    Tnx..
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
     
    #8

    May 4, 2009, 05:28 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by elle11zee View Post
    i'll take ur advice. can you give me any idea what kind of strategy would i do to know his intentions?
    There's no strategy involved. All you do is ask him why he's been contacting you when he already said that he wants to break up. Take his answer and go from there.
    Romefalls19's Avatar
    Romefalls19 Posts: 4,739, Reputation: 1130
    Ultra Member
     
    #9

    May 4, 2009, 06:14 AM

    Avoid, you aren't ready to handle a relationship with him. Block his attempts to contact you as you deserve to heal, it's hard work and will take time.
    elle11zee's Avatar
    elle11zee Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #10

    May 7, 2009, 02:57 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Romefalls19 View Post
    Avoid, you aren't ready to handle a relationship with him. Block his attempts to contact you as you deserve to heal, it's hard work and will take time.
    Thanks to all of u guys! I'm actually doing myself a favor.. I have all the reasons to avoid him:D

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