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hey guys i am new to this site so please bare with me =)
I am 26 year old male who i would say am a good looking guy, i own my own house, i have a good job etc... i guess what i am trying to say is i have a good life and i have a lot to show for.
Now 6 montn i fell deeply in love with an old friend from high school which i havent seen for years. I have been doing anything in the book for this person, from romantic to sweet stuff, anything you could think of i have done it for her.
however my problem is i DO NOT get the same treatment back at all, she keeps on telling me that she is not sure if she wants a serious relationship but at the same time when i try to walk away she says she cant let me go because she cars about me too much. This has been going on for 6 month now, and my heart hurts, everyone i know tells me to walk away but i find it so hard because i am so in love with her.... Any advice guys on what i shlould do please advise. thank you so much and sorry for the lengthy e-mail!!!
Ok secondly have you ever spoken to her upfrontly about your feelings for her? Expressed your feelings to her?
Besides giving her all these materialist things!
She says she is not sure if she wants a serious relationship, but how can a relationship be serious in it first few months!!! Think about it.
Well we have been together for 6month now, and yes i told her how i feel about her. Now when i say that i did a lot for her trust me i did not mean that i go out and buy her the world lol. What i mean was i am there for her when she needs me, if she needs help i am right there for her and some cute corny stuff lol.
Now my problem is at some point she told me she was falling for me and so on, next month is different. She has constent mood swings =( and i almost never ever see anyting in return, she barely ever calls, she never does those nice corny things that i would love, she never tells me she misses me, ans she ever barely wants to spend time with me.
Now after all that she still refuses to let me go, i mean is she scared of commitement, is she keeping me around because she dosent want to be alone????
Thats why i am so confused, my heart tells me stay but my head and logic tells me to walk away, i hope this helped???
I am not trying to sound weird but i never heard of that saying? it does sounds intersting though, would you care to explain it to me please?
We all had bad breakups and bad experiences, and i know that she did, she tells me all the time, but i am paying the price for it.......
So in other words do i stay and try some more even tough this is tearing me apart or do i leave?
if you are goign to ask me is she is worth the stay well, 2 month ago i wouls have said yes but now its fading, the pain is really starting to get to me???
WOW im shocked
It means basically what it states! Literally - word for word.
Yes ofcourse we grow stronger and independant with certain experience we share in life.
I personally, would leave. I wouldnt put it up with no longer.
You said, 6 months this has been like that.
6 months which caused you more pain and sadness instead of love and happiness.
Leave - threat her meen.
She may soon realise what a bad mistake she has done by acting this way, and hurting your feeling - keeps her keen!
Relatiionships are give and take and it sounds like you are not getting what you want/need. Whats keeping you in the relationship is the "hope" that you will get what you want...but the history shows that it may not be there. I'd move on....
Well Here_To_Help-Jon, think what you like. Although you said i gave poor advice you said exactly wat i said at the end :- LEAVE
But this poor guy has had 6 months of pain, due to her simple and mixed attitude and actions.
How much longer can he stick to it!
She has him wrapped round her little ringer and she is doing what she likes with him.
Its not fair on him.
So treat her mean and keep her keen i thinks fits quite well with this issue
hey guys, i get it, thats a god quote =) You know i tried doing that for a while where i ignored her and not call her or show her the time of day, and surprisingly it worked. hse came around more and was nicer to me.
But i cant do it, i am a nice guy and i want to be myself, and i sure as hell do not want to play those games just to have her, and also i dont think you should convince her to be with me she should want to be with me on her own dont you think???
But again thanks again for the good advice i will take some appropriate action in the next couple of days and i am sure i will be back for more questions and i will keep you updated than you so much again...
I didnt exactly mean to totally ignore her.
But instead of always telling her you miss her, dont say it at all. Dont be clingy towards her, if u get my point, as she may think she could be losing you and soon realise she doesnt wanna lose you.
Its not a game - its tactic
But im sure whatever you do will be the right thing.
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