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My boyfriend keeps on saying he wants to go to the club. The first time he seid something he was like i want to go on Halloween and i told him he could go but id go to a wild party if he went. Then he told his friend he might go this weekend. Hes 18 and im 17 otherwise wede go together. Personally the only reason guys go to the club in my mind is if they are going to meet someone or to dance with girls. I dont want to tell him that because i dont want him to question my trust, but i dont think its right for him to go out dance with girls and me stuck at home doing nothing.
Why are you stuck at home doing nothing? You don't have to sit around while he is out. You could plan a girls night and do something fun with your friends.
First of all is the only reason you go out anywhere to meet guys? My guess is no. Guys like to go out and hang out together and do their guy stuff. As you get older you will see the value of a boyfriend have guys night and you having girls night. If you trust him there should be no problems.
One of the best relationships I knew of worked this way (granted the people in question were 27 and 33) but Friday night was Guys/Girls night. So my friend would make big fun plans with us and her boyfriend would make plans with his friends. Saturday would be a night for us all to hang out together which was great since we all got along with her boyfriend and his friends and Sunday was their day. It worked great for them. You need time to hang out with friends in a relationship a relationship is not about being together all the time
I don't go out to clubs or anything like that because im content with the man i have. He works 6-6 during the week so i barely see him. Me and my friends do hang out and let the guys go out and go wherever. I just feel that hes going to the club to meet girls due to something he asked me a month ago. I think i should talk to him and tell him how i feel and let him go. I could always go to my friends house and we could plan something to do for the night.
personally i think your right im a 18 year old bloke and my missus is 17 and in all fairness id let her go out with her male friends anytime im firm yet fair it's like shes ok to go out with other blokes aslong as nothing dodgy happens and if it does she knows its over like that as im pretty close with her friends and they would tell me if she did anything with another man but theres always room for doubt key point is speak to him say you feel its unfair that he gets to have all the fun while your stuck at home these are the best years of your life go out and use them wisely
Don't turn this into a conflict. Look back to when you first met. Was he into clubing then or has it come about recently. For you to tell him you'll go to your own wild party if he goes to a club is very provocative and will throw another tarp on communications; not smart to do if you see the relationship as long term. I would think there are many things going on at a club, relaxing and talking with friends, etc but you are not alone with your concerns and once you've sharpened the communications the 2 of you should calmly talk about each other's goals, needs and what each is willing to put into a relationship in order to keep it strong, healthy and secure and remember he may simply be going to a club to unwind, relax and chat with the boys which may not be a bad idea and he might not have any desire to meet some exotic woman and hide in an ally while she sucks on his eyeballs. Such opportunities have been present for years and he's with you not other women. Both of you have lots of time so go easy and try on your great smile and trust till there's a concrete reason not to.
You need to understand that being 18 is a milestone....he is finally allowed in clubs. That is a big thing for 18 year olds. His guy friends are probably really wanting him to go.
How long until you turn 18?
Maybe you could sit down and talk to him. The main focus of a "club" is dancing. So if you tell him that is why you are concerned...just talk to him. Tell him you don't mind him going to hang out with his friends, but you would prefer him not to be grinding on every girl that looks his way.
Trust is a big thing. If he thinks you don't trust him, your relationship is slowly going to crumble.
The same thing is going to happen when he turns 21 and you are still 20. He is going to want to go out to the bars. 18 and 21 are big milestones, and people want to experience what they once couldn't.
I agree with everyone else...plan a night of your own. Have a fun girls night!
My husband and I set up guy nights and girl nights. You need to have that time with your friends. These kind of things make a relationship stronger.
I think i should talk to him and tell him how i feel and let him go.
He is 18, neither his mama or you, can tell a grown man what to do. Either trust him, or give him his freedom. How long does a relationship last, if one partner tries to control the other??
Going to a club doesn't automaticly mean he's going to cheat. And if he is the type to cheat then keeping him home one night isn't going to stop him. And since when did dancing become cheating?
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