Hi all,

I was wondering if we can tell stories about our experiences with giving your partner a 'second chance'.

What made you decide to give it a second chance.
How it went.
Did it work out the second time around.

And finally...
Would you do it again?

ceriphante

I refused to give her a second chance, she didn't deserve it, and in fact she never will no matter who she is, if she blows it with me its over, end of story.

hows that?

tiredandlonely

If you blew it, would you be asking for a second chance? I think your statement is pretty radical and not really realistic. There are times that people do make mistakes, people learn from mistakes and they can improve themselves from those mistakes. I personally have learned a lot about myself and the mistakes that i have made. if I were given a second chance, I am better prepared on how to handle my relationship.

talaniman

Maybe a better question would be about breaking up with that first real love, that's the one that got me.

ceriphante

If I blew it I would not expect a second chance, no.

and it works perfectly well for me if someone makes a mistake the kind that completely destroys any trust in a relationship then great that they learn but why should someone else have to suffer as a result of their mistake?

If you were not given a second chance it should not rob you of the opportunity to grow emotionally and learn from your mistakes for next time, and if you believe that by not having that second opportunity that it does then whos not being realistic?

with life I think its about taking responsibility for your own actions, and its about time more of us started doing exactly that.

dbennett24

would not go back. i gave my husband a second chance and he is worse. now i just complicated it more. move on and enjoy life. it is too short to have problems.

tiredandlonely

[quote=ceriphante]

If you were not given a second chance it should not rob you of the opportunity to grow emotionally and learn from your mistakes for next time, and if you believe that by not having that second opportunity that it does then whos not being realistic?

QUOTE]

If I get a second oppurtunity then go Me!!, If not it is very unfortunate. I am very realistic about second chances. My mistake has nothing to do with trust, my biggest mistake was about working too much, too much to enjoy my beautiful girlfriend. The trust was there, as a matter of fact, I was the one that had to endure to trying issues with her. I gave her a second chance, and a third chanCe. I was cheated on, which I forgave her for, and she abused some of my prescription medications. All of which occurred prior to our relationship getting serious. These both occurred within six months of our relationship. Most people would have said "good bye", not I, I stuck by her and we worked through it. It was very tough on me emotionally and it took me a very lonG time to completley trust her. Then I started bustinG my butt, to work for our future, and make money now so we both didnt need to work so hard, then she decides to give up on me. If she gives me a second chance, I am going to cherish the oppurtunity. I realize that workinG is not everything. I just wanted us to be ok.. I would rather suffer a little financially, then not to have my girlfrienD in my life. So if it doesnt work, guess what, I have learned but I think that second chances should be given. By saying that you would never ever give any one a second chance, anD you wouldnt expect a second chance, I feel that you are beinG too closed minded. If you were atleast accepting that it were possible would be realistic.

SAB123

She was my first love thats probally why I took her back 1,2,3,4,5,6 times. But all the time we were apart I never healed myself to really see what the problems/issues I / we were having. And when we got back we still didn't really talk about the problems we were having and 7 months later, break up time. I guess if you do give a person a second chance communicate why/how this happened. I probally will never give a person a second chance again.

tiredandlonely

How long were you apart from her each of the times you broke up? How did she act when you guys broke up? Did you break up with her or vice versa?

SAB123

Qoute]sab123
Thru the 5 yrs we were to gether I broke up with her twice the most I waited was about a week then called a said I was making a mistake(this doesn't include the 5-6 she did to me.)She made me wait On 1 of them about 3 months, 2 of them about 2 months and the rest where a week or two. As far as how many break up I really cant remember. I'm trying to think now and cant I guess it was the stress of the relationship. When she broke up with me it always over the phone and she would just say I want to break up and hang up phone I usually found out a month later why but the firt break up she told me she was going to quit smoking and don't call her for a couple of weeks. About 5 days later I called her because I missed her. When she picked up phone just said I want to break up and hung phone up. I took her 2 months to tell me why she broke up. Talking about torture to myself for3 months (I don't ever want to go thru that pain again)

tiredandlonely

I was in a somewhat similar position. I was with a girl for 16 months. We fought at times. On Valentines Day Weekend, I broke up with her, it last maybe two days at the most. I was just upset. 3 weeks later she was under tremendous stress and she broke up with me. Here I am almost two months later and still really missing her. I attempted to make contact with her several times. I actually went to get my stuff at her house the one day, which made matters worse. She contacted me about a week ago, I sent her jewelry back to her. I asked for the stuff back like a fool. I was hurt, so i wanted to hurt her. Well she called, we talked briefly. She is truly my first real love. Here I am 32 years old, she is 31 we both love each other I know it. We both said some hurtful things when I went to get her stuff. She called me last week, she wants to come to my house on monday to get her stuff from my house. My friends think she might want to talk. I am looking to get a second chance with her. I have been trying to give her space to think. i know the time has made me a better person, and in the same token has shown me what I really want, which is her. Things will be different if I am given a second chance. Let me ask you, the first time she broke up with you, how long did it last?