I wont make this too long, but stay with me here...
I had a vague haunch that my wife was cheating on me with several men while I was at work and thought I knew nothing of it.This happened last year, but I virtually stumbled upon the proof that it happened Its' not really definte proof, but one of them stole something from us (while in my house getting high with her), and we had a Huge argument (police called)... I realized that if I raised suspicion, she'd contact them to warn them that I might know. So, I found someone I could confide in and told them, and we both agreed that my wife should have ABSOLUTELY no reason to contact the former lover. I threw a bone out (seen John lately?) to see if she'd grab it and wouldn't you know, my confidant told me, she called him and asked how did I find out , and told him not to tell me anything!
Thats' all I have to go on. What should I do? We're close to divorcing anyway, I just don't want to go to my grave not knowing this, as she threatens to divorce me if she finds Im cheating (not).

smoothy

if she is empty the accounts before she does....yeah you might have to hand some of it over later but at least you aren't stuck penniless till you can get some back after she does. And yeah...I knew women that did just that. Wasn't bad enough they were cheating they took the money and ran too.

losthusband

It's not expensive at all. You have to have a portable tape recorder, I paid about $24.95. The device that plugs to your tape recorder is around $20.00. You plug it into any phone jack in the house. Usually you have one behind a guest bed or somewhere. I ran a wire from one of my plugs to a closet she never went in. When the phone rings it starts recording. Get a 120 min cassette. Buy two you can swap them out each day and record over them. Be prepared for what you may hear. I heard the phone ring and then, hello, what are you doing?? Then after a conversation of a few minutes she asked him to meet her the following weekend. I was totally knocked down off my feet. There is nothing as hurtful as what you may hear. Plan out what you are going to do and don't do anything stupid that might only hurt yourself. My biggest mistake was I confronted her with the tape and she knew that I knew. I wished I had waited until they met and surprised them so I really knew what was going on. She said nothing happened but she stayed out one night until the morning and they were together. I know she lied but have no way to prove it. If you don't catch them in the act she will never face what she did and the pain she caused. What you don't know makes them make it less horrific. If you decide to stay with her then you can use the phone to check her if you ever have any more doubts. It will be hard for you to ever trust her again and this will give you some peace. Good luck, the people at radio shack will tell you what you need.

smoothy

Also check your local laws....certain areas prohibit such recordings, while others don't. Hopefully you live in an area that doesn't so it would be admissible in divorce court as evidence.

But like losthusband said...don't do something dumb if you hear something bad. You will have to have serious self control to resist any urges you might have at that moment. All will be wrong to act on.