My boyfriend & I have been together nearly 7 1/2 yrs now. A few months back, a matter happened, actually petty in nature. Anyhow, right when that happened, he will not tell me he loves me, and is quite distant, except still wanting intimacy. A couple years ago, he gave me an engagement ring at Xmas. However, he never actually popped the question. He is quite manly. So, time to time, I would bring up the subject of our plans, and he would evade it. But then that following summer, talked of the subject to his best friend's wife. I would always let some time pass before posing the subject again.. and then he would say why do I push..?. So, did he regret giving the ring or was this supposed to be a passify? Well, giving me the ring has caused some strains, and have had ups & downs these past 2 years. I wish he never gave me the ring unless he was truly ready for the consquence.. We never talked marriage before the ring, so I thought he was really ready, since he made the action. We both had been married before, me almost 8 yrs, and him about 2 yrs. And unfortunately, he is manipulative in the relationship, never can say he is sorry, like it's my privilege to be with him. And I'm quite sensitive, usually saying I'm sorry, even when it's not my fault, so that the issue will subside. Our communication is not the greatest. I'll admit I close up... but am learning to say what is on my mind. He just shuts the door.. and is hard to talk to.. And when he gets upset at things, he goes through with the silent treatment... And doesn't show emotions. He didn't talk to his parents for nearly 5 yrs over something he got upset about... and doesn't talk to his sister at all. This yes scares me that he can live like this... But I know I've been told I can do better, but I am in love with this man. When most of the times are good, I enjoy him and how he makes me feel. And I hope he still loves me... but the months can't keep going on like this... I feel like a convienent roommate. I've told him my feelings, and I deserve him to open up... I can't believe someone can turn off their feelings in one moment. How should I talk to him without making him feel defensive... and to see if he'll give us a real chance to work on things if he still loves me? I am not ready to throw in the towel... unless of course he truly doesn't want/love me. Please help me, I'm hurting so much.. I miss him. Is he going through mid-life crisis? He is just over 40 now.. Anyhow, any advice would be great...