I have unfortunately been in an affair for over a year now. Everything was of course, always on his terms. He has recently decided (for reasons unknown to me) that he wants out of the affair. I knew it would eventually come to this, but I find myself left heartbroken and angry. I feel like calling his wife to let her know but am not sure if that is what I should do. If I choose to, how would I go about telling her?

eduble

Tell the wife and let the chips fall where they may. Let her decided what she is going to do with her cheater. Stay or work it out. She may already know and have questions for you.

tamading

I have the other side to this dilemma...I was the wife of a man having an affair and let me assure you before you make the call make sure he is being honest with you about his homelife. My husband treats me like a queen and our children like they are the stars in his sky. We have excellent lovelife, sexlife, and friendship. I did not know he had an affair until 4 months ago when he confessed that he was the father to a newborn baby. He did not tell me the woman was pregnant until he got a paternity test. She is now reduced to seeing him when he sees her son but told by him in front of me, that is was a sex mistake and he adores me and his kids and could never leave us. Never thought about it. Make sure his love for you is real, and Karma is a mighty thing.

Sad Soul

It's one thing to tell her when you are a mature woman who tries to fix the wrong.

But it's a whole other thing to want to tell her just because you did not get your way, and you are "so heartbroken". This is selfish and childish.

Leave her alone. It's time you start working on you, and making sure you don't fall into these types of scenarios again. Make a list of how you can become a woman who does not sleep with another woman's man. Make a list of how you want to become honest and worth more than that. Otherwise, you're not going to find a man who will respect you or treat you right.

Trust me, it'll be great to be worth more than that.

Applejacks83irv

wooooohh! hey! it takes 2 and YOU should know better!!, and that he was married. Just becs he fell out of intests in you and he grew a brain... don't give you the right to tell he's old lady...becs your heartbroken... just like every man or woman in this world get over it and and find someone who will love you....And when you do? Do yourself a favor don't tell him your past! ...becs you will give him the right to throw thats frist stone....