I and my boyfriend broke up before, and now we were get back in the relationship almost 10 months. I’m living in his apartment (for his required), but I still keeping my own apartment. He threw away all the pictures of his previous relationship that show him he is serious with ours before we get back together. We’re in serious relationship and he says I am the one he would marry to. But he hasn’t made a proposal.
My question is in our relationship situation, do I need to throw my ex’s pictures away and make it fair? He threw all pictures away because he want to show he want this relationship and want me to forgive him what he had done. But he thinks I should do the same. What I think is, I wasn’t the one did something wrong in this relationship and try to get it back. Why I need to do the same, throw the ex’s pictures away. I think I will throw it all away after if he proposed me. But not because he did it and I need to do the same. Any advice?

SAB123

You had those pictures before you met this guy wright. And if you feel you want to keep a part of your past he shouldn,t have a problem with this. And if you guys have trust between each other those pictures shouldn't mean anything to him. When I first started dating my now ex when we started getting serious she told me that she ocassionaly talked to her ex husband. I wasn't bothered by it because I trusted her, without trust their is no relationship. So if you want to keep memories of your past I say keep them. I now when I get over ex and start dating It will be my decision to keep them. Because rite now I don't have a girlfriend but I still have those pictures of ex.

iamintrouble

I feel the same! But if I still keep them. He will says I don't care what he think, and he think I still have feeling of my ex's that's why I want to keep it. Then, we will going to start agusment about it. The things is I asked him to throw away all those ex's pictures before we got back together, becasue I want him to show he care of our relationship, and he did. Now he think it isn't fair that if I still keep my ex's picture.

shygrneyzs

If you were not prepared to do the same as you asked him, then I do not see how you come out feeling upset that he now wants you to throw out your ex's pics. You cannot have it both ways. I know you will not understand that and say that this break up was not your fault, it was his. Are you playing an upper hand with him? That is what it sounds like. If this becomes a real serious contention between you two, then leave the relationship and don't go back to him.

Sdjosh

My ex kept her pictures of her old relationships. I was going through some old boxes and i found her pictures. It bothered me at first until i took the time to understand that that was her life and she was entitled to those memories. I never mentioned it and when she broke up with me i made sure to get her those pictures. I also added some of us in there as well.

I know i will keep the ones of us because she will always be apart of me.

alkaline

No, you don't need to throw away your pictures.

Those are YOUR memories of YOUR life. You are absolutely entitled to them. The fair solution? Put them away in a box someplace where he never has to see them. Don't show those pictures to friends or family while he is around.

He has no right to ask you for forget or disregard your past. In fact, I think he has a lot of nerve asking you to do so. It seems to me he decided to throw away his pictures all on his own, I didn't see you indicate that you told him to. Well, that was his choice, but it doesn't mean that you have to reciprocate. If he shot his ex in the head to prove his love to you, would you have to do that, too?

Pfft. He's being incredibly immature. He isn't ready to talk about marriage if he can't get over the fact that you have dated other men. That's reality. Most people don't marry the first person they date, and to ask them to erase their past is selfish, jealous, and juvenile.

In addition, he hasn't asked you to marry him yet! Do you know how many guys have "told" me they are going to marry me in my life? More than five. And guess what? There is still no ring on my finger. It is really easy to "say" you're going to marry someone someday, but it is another thing entirely to actually go through with it.

So what happens if he doesn't ask you to marry him, and you guys break up, and you've thrown away all your pictures? How will you feel then? That would be pretty unfair to you, wouldn't it? I hate to say it, but when it comes to get married, words can be pretty cheap. I wouldn't count on marrying him until he actually takes a serious step towards that.

And even if you DO get engaged, you still have a right to keep your pictures. They're just pictures! If he is that intimidated by the fact that you have a past, he is the one with a problem and needs to grow up.

Keep your pictures, just don't throw them in his face. Out of sight, out of mind, right?

Good luck!

Fr_Chuck

Of course you don't throw away your photos, Even after I got married, I still kept a few ( ok then I got rid of alot of them) but photos are what we look at 30 years from now and remember when. Now I don't keep them in a album on the shelf, they are stored away, but they are kept.

So he threw his away, you are not required to live up to his rules and regulations

*** you said ( for his required) as for living in his apartment, what did you mean about that ??

iamintrouble

he doesn't want to seprate and want to see each other all the time. He tried to sleep in my place, but he feel my neibor a little bit noisy for him, so he want me to live in his place. Meanwhile, we still looking for bigger apartment.

talaniman

Keep your pictures they are yours. If the relationshp doen't work you will regret throwing them away. On the other hand you never should have let him get rid of his.

iamintrouble

actually, I didn't really asked him to get rid of them. He signed up a lot of dating sites before and stored some of those woman pictures he met on-line on his computer and closet. I was asked him to cancel all those dating sites to appove he takes serious about our relationship, otherwise I won't let myself back in this relationship. So he did, and also, he voluntarily to get rid of those ex's pictures at that time. That was happened before.