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How about if we use this thread to count the NC days, all of us? Each one would mention how long he/she's been maintaining the NC period and how he/she feels with time.
Maybe in some way this can help us all (including me)?
This is my first NC day.. Afternoon here, so far didn't even touch my phone. I don't know how I feel, but I'm not that miserable, I have a goal and thinking about it, NOT HER!
I am at the 2 month mark.It has been a tough,tough 2 months.I was in a daze for the first month.Then I thought I had it beaten,then wallop,more pain and suffering.So although I am healing I do expect tough days ahead.I am proud of myself and will not break NC.If she ever wants me back,she'll have to come to me.That way we would be entering back on equal terms,giving our relationship a much better chance.If I chased her and even got her back,then I would be walking on eggshells forever after.So NC is the way to go,it can do absolutely no harm,but a hell of a lot of good.You will have your dignity intact and walk with your head tall.
I am at the 2 month mark.It has been a tough,tough 2 months.I was in a daze for the first month.Then I thought I had it beaten,then wallop,more pain and suffering.So although I am healing I do expect tough days ahead.I am proud of myself and will not break NC.If she ever wants me back,she'll have to come to me.That way we would be entering back on equal terms,giving our relationship a much better chance.If I chased her and even got her back,then I would be walking on eggshells forever after.So NC is the way to go,it can do absolutely no harm,but a hell of a lot of good.You will have your dignity intact and walk with your head tall.
It is tough but it sounds like you are doing way better than most at the two month mark. A lot of people seem to still be debating whether or not to contact the ex. You are not at that stage and are clear that any contact must come from her.
The focus, which I am starting to realise after 4 months NC, should be about you not getting her back. Start enjoying being single again. If she comes back, you can be objective, if not, it is her loss.
I am approaching 4 months now. I still miss my ex and my head is clear and focused. I however dont have the desire to contact her really. I have several ways to contact her if I chose except her cell number it got changed when we broke up and I never saved or memorized her new number I can not say how much that has truly helpded me. I probably would of drunk called her 20 times by now lol!. Neways the holiday season hit me hard until I realized she was not a holiday person very cold about it actually didnt seem to enjoy or get into them that much. She is a good person wouldnt bad talk her but I guess not for me. 4 months and counting till I meet the 1 who truly apprciates who I am.
It is tough but it sounds like you are doing way better than most at the two month mark. A lot of people seem to still be debating whether or not to contact the ex. You are not at that stage and are clear that any contact must come from her.
The focus, which I am starting to realise after 4 months NC, should be about you not getting her back. Start enjoying being single again. If she comes back, you can be objective, if not, it is her loss.
Yes I too would like to think that at 4 months I will not be thinking about getting her back.Hopefully by that stage I won't want her back.Right now I do want her back,but not at any price.
Yes I too would like to think that at 4 months I will not be thinking about getting her back.Hopefully by that stage I won't want her back.Right now I do want her back,but not at any price.
Well that is a good place to be in. You are not going to be needy and try and get her back. Any approach MUST come from her.
As you say, in a few months time, you may not even be bothered about her contacting you!
Last time i spoke with my ex was on Oct 24 so tomorrow will be two weeks..that day she called while i was in class i wouldnt had picked up if i knew it was her but she called private and i thought it was one of my friends who always calls private...when i picked up she sounded shy..n then just said that she was callin to see if i was still alive???...I actually called her two days after that out of anger of hearin that she was walkin around my neighborhood with her new bf..that was it.. even though this NC works i feel like we are all stuck waitin for them to call in my case the day she called even if it was for her dumb question it gave me some sense of relief not even hope but just brighten the day to know that she had to be thinkin of me in order for her to call... I dont like feelin like i have to rely or wait for her to call to give me this sense of peace of mind... Do any of you feel the same way???
The view that I take is that if she calls, great, I can deal with it, but it must be her who makes the first move. She must realise it was her loss. If not, well, that's life and I will find someone new and probably better for me before long anyway.
she first mentioned this break thing about 2 months ago. but didnt say we didnt have to not talk she just said not talk as much. so i felt bad and id contact her once a week to show i didnt forget her. but she'd never put any effort into it, it was always me doing it. so then finally i stopped contacting. been 2 weeks. deff going to go on for a 3rd week because this is finals week for the both of us and im real busy so deff not gonna try and contact her. but this is the longest time of not talking to each other in seriously 2 years. its a weird experience for me. im hoping she will soon miss me too. im also putting to test all the stuff she said about us bout this not being some break up that she does have faith in us just wants to hold off till she feels more ready to put in the time needed. i just have to see if she met what she said about everything. so im just not gonna do anything anymore and let her come back to me. i did send her a card though that was real nice and simple just saying gluck on finals...should be there sometime this week
The view that I take is that if she calls, great, I can deal with it, but it must be her who makes the first move. She must realise it was her loss. If not, well, that's life and I will find someone new and probably better for me before long anyway.
Correct Question,I sometimes let the heart rule the head.I start texting a message of undying love to my ex,playing into her arms.She is probably waiting for this text,cos in the past I did send it,more than once.Not again,my heart has been kicked to touch and my logical self is now in the driving seat.Imagine,they break your heart,then we give them the reassurance that we are lost without them.What does that spell out to them??? That we are sad pathetic losers.Well I won't be doing it Question.Of course I have had the temptations,but thankfully my mind overruled my heart.A good tip,send a text message to your own mobile number......"I will not contact her,no matter what.If she loves me she will contact me.After all she dumped me.Do not do it"......
Just remember this,next time you get weak!
Mine will be 2 months tomorrow. I have had ZERO contact with her. She however had tried to contact me up until 5 weeks ago. I would not reply to any of her messages. I am still doing crappy. I have started to get angry and cant believe some of the things she has done to me. I wanted so much for her to come back and I miss her so much but I will never let that on to anyone other than on here. I have been so good about being all fixing myself. I still miss her so much though. It makes me sad we are not together. But I am doing good on my own. Just still shocked and feel dumb as a rock.
we have tried this a whole bunch of times, specially comming out of me. and him just accepting it, but at the end i fell for his calls. now he is wiilling to start the process, i miss him alot i did see him today, kalled him again, with no answer. even though i wish he'd answer, it is good in a way because it keeps me from hearing his voice and struggling with this. so since he did not picked up the phone today i will start the nc tomorrow. gotta go to sleep now...!!! I just hope i kan.
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