Sports Metaphor for Understanding Break Ups
Asked Oct 19, 2007, 02:55 PM
I thought I'd share 2 metaphors that explains the emotions of someone who was left by someone in a relationship.
1. Football analogy.
When you are in a relationship, you and the other person share dreams and goals with each other like everyone on a football team. Your ultimate goal is to share your life with the other person and spend the rest of your life with that person. The goal of the team is to win that title. Both relationships require trust and everyone to be on the same page. We are the quarterback and your running back (your gf/bf) is suppose to protect your blindside. The play is maximum protection and you looking down the field to take steps to reach your goal, but your running back doesn't block the rusher because he/she has his/her own agenda and lets you get blindsided.
The actual feeling and better description, which doesn't really happen in football, is that your own running back comes and strips the ball from your hands. You are left standing there confused and shocked. What the *explitive* is going on here? You thought everyone was on the same page and was marching in the same direction, but that other person was not what you thought they were. For what ever reason, they quit on you. It doesn't mean that there's anything wrong with you. In football, players leave good teams for a variety of reasons, more money elsewhere, more playing time, more limelight, etc. The grass looks greener and they do what's best for themselves. Somewhat selfish, because if they continued on, great things could have been accomplished.
The initial stage, you are left standing there like a deer in the headlights, you are shocked and can't believe what happened. You feel betrayed, you ask if you did something wrong. It's not you, it's not your fault. You simply might have had the wrong teammate.
How long can you stand there? The clock, life, is passing you by. It's up to you to get up and continue your to play your game. You will lose those seconds ticking off the clock of life, if you continue standing there. Time seems to stand still, but it isn't. You have to take control and decide how are you going to overcome this hurdle.
Can you wait for your old running back to come back? If they do, can you trust him/her with the ball after what did to you? What explanation is good enough? You need to decide if that day comes.
You need to go to your other teammates (friends) that you can depend on to continue moving forward. You will find another running back (gf/bf) that will share the same goals that will stick with you and won't blindside you.
2. Doubles Tennis
Your tennis partner quit on you and what can you do? Take on life in the singles game, until you find that doubles partner that matches your type of game.
In either case, you need to move on and the right teammate will come along. Don't make them starter right away, test him or her out, and understand for whatever reason if it doesn't work out, it's OK.
Good luck to all and stay strong. Brighter days are ahead.