At Ask Me Help Desk you can ask questions in any topic and have them
answered for free by our experts. To ask questions or participate in
answering them you must register for a free account. By registering you
will be able to:
Get free answers from experts in any of our 300+
topics.
I am a 20 year old male, gay, and I am hopelessly in love with my roommate of three years. He, unfortunately, has all the symptoms of straightness. Most importantly, he has a girlfriend who he loves to have sex with.. I think. Through the years, he has become my best friend. he knows I'm gay and I have accepted that I shouldn't look for a relationship in his direction. That was all nice and fine until school let out this summer and we decided to rent a house together. his girlfriend took and internship in another state and he sees her maybe once every two weeks. Since the beginning of May, he has started to act really flirty with me and unfortunately it is working and I'm starting to fall for him in a way I haven't in a few years.
He always sits next to me with some part of his body touching me. Sometimes he randomly grabs me from behind and tells me he loves me. Sometimes he'll just sit in my lap. He gives me a lot of attention and the first thing he does when he gets home is find me and ask me what I want to do with him that afternoon. A few days he opened up to me about a couple of things he never told me before including that he didn't want to go see his girlfriend this weekend. He said it was too much of a hassle and he'd just rather stay here.
Anyway, as the weeks wore on, I started to get more and more hopeful about the possibility of something forming between us. Then all of a sudden, two days ago, he withdrew. Then his girlfriend came over to surprise him and he spent the whole weekend with her making sex sounds in their room. I hadn't realized that I had gotten so attached to him. it actually hurt me hearing those sounds on the way to the bathroom.
What should I do? I don't think I have the will power required to avoid him. He'll sense it anyway and try to get me to go out with him or something which I'll do without thinking.
I don't believe people go through sexual phases (men at least) because research indicates that male sexual orientation is stable, unlike women. I would definitely get involved if the opportunity presented itself, even though it might end up being purely sexual. Thanks for your concern though.
BTW Jiser-you're straight and fell in love with your best friend of the same sex? Just clarifying
I don't believe people go through sexual phases (men at least) because research indicates that male sexual orientation is stable, unlike women. I would definitely get involved if the opportunity presented itself, even though it might end up being purely sexual. Thanks for your concern though.
BTW Jiser-you're straight and fell in love with your best friend of the same sex? Just clarifying
Love is a really confusing thing. You can fall head over heels for someone of any sex without a sexual component at all. Sexuality isn't clearcut either. I look forward to a day when we don't draw those lines and people can explore their feelings without all the weight that comes with it.
I mean look at me. I fell in love with my best friend and I don't even find him particularly attractive. Love is deeper than a lot of things. I know he loves me. There was a time I think he love me more than anyone else. I know there was I time I felt that way about him and it wasn't until a few weeks ago did I start to want to become his boyfriend. Somehow the two weren't related.
To be 100% honest, I don't know if I'm 100% gay myself. I know I think guys are attractive and I know I don't feel like having sex with women. On the other hand, I can find women attractive and I don't think about sex when I think about guys. I can't stand gay porn, I'll just watch someone jack off or something, but if it gets too gay I'll switch to something else. Now don't get me wrong, I am out of the closet gay, but it isn't like the line is really clear. Maybe I'm just not driven by sex.
Oh great you saw my question. Well i've been friends with this guy for about 4 years and I met him when I met my boyfriend, the went to the same school...they are friends. Here is what makes me suspicious: he has mostly girl friends, very gossipy, he has guy friends but gets jealous acting when they don't give him attention, he is very sassy with my boyfriend and just makes comments that make you wonder, he has never had a girlfriend(although he claims to "like" certain women), and his voice and body language are very different for a guy, especially for a large African American guy. I have a gay friend who knows "James" and he told me that "James" has commented him on his "beautiful eyes" What do you think about all of this?
Lol, I would hate to embarrass him. The other day his phone rang and it played that "secret lover" song and I was like "who is that" and he said it was one of his buds who also acts a little gay and then he got a little quiet like "oh no I wasn't suppose to say that." Lol if he is I wish he'd just tell me!
Hmmm...I hate that. I wish (jokingly) that I was psychic so there wouldn't be all of this confusion surrounding straights. You never can tell what's going on upstairs lol Just last week I hooked up with a 28 year old closet case who was raised in Chicago (not the suburbs, the actual city!) It's not like he grew up in a hostile environment and he said his parents are pretty liberal. Also, he was TOTALLY butch...beer drinking, football watching, nut scratching straighty.
Linear Mode
