my ex of 2 yrs (live in relationship)had cheated on me after a distance relationship of about 4 months and i took her back but she cheated again but i was so lost and confused that i wanted to be together again..after all the tries and some suggestions from this site...i moved on ..so far i have not contacted her for almost a fortnite...
I dont want her back anymore.....i m happy to get myself back.
i had helped my ex a lot especially when she had an operation and a job interview...There was a lot of complications.....After she got the job ...she helped me too with money around ..2000 dollars....i want to pay her back and asked her for her account or address to send a portion of it by money transfer but she asked me not to be mean..i told her..to forget about what ever we had done for each other in past and that i wanted to pay her back cos its her money and i needed to do this to be happy but ..she flatly refused..she said she would feel guilty....as i had done a lot for her too....My intention is not to make her guilty..i am just buying back my pride...and when she refuses to take the money..i feel like she is trying to compensate me for the help i gave her and that makes me angry..as you know she is in a different country now..what should i do? oh...yeah a friend of mine who works with her is coming home so i was thinking of sending it through him..Any suggestions.... i really want to pay her back..what does she mean by saying feel guilty?

flyinghigh09

by the way she is with another guy and she is really happy with the relationship

BMI

Ask yourself why. Why are you doing this? You have answered the question above but REALLY look deep!!!

If you want to pay her back than it is something that can be done quite easily and does not require a long, drawn out story friend. If something else is at work here youwould be wise to let that out here first.

I only suggest this b/c most times with stories involving an ex theirare other motives at play that dictate actions initiated, sometimes (most times) you are unaware. Whatstrikes meabout your post is the fact you felt the need to tell us she waswith someone and that she is happy. Interesting piece of information that has nothing to do with paying her back.

BMI

Oh, BTW, I like your profile pic, that too is interesting.

squeaks77

You're saying "I'm buying back my pride" but she's hearing "I'm paying off my whore".
Just let it go or donate the money to a charity.

talaniman

She has refused, so drop the whole subject, and leave her alone.

svatnsdal

I agree with talaniman, leave it alone! If you think you have to pay the money, like squeaks77 said, donate it!

confused25

I was actually in a similar situation not too long ago, but I was in her position. I gave my ex-girlfriend a pretty expensive piece of technology that helped her a lot with work. After we broke up she wanted to give it back but I told her to keep it because it was a gift and I never had any intention of taking it back.

Well, she has a lot of pride and as soon as she had the money she bought something to replace it and had a friend drop off the gift at my place. It was clear that she did it because she wanted to get rid of every memory of me and prove that she didn't need anyone to help her. However, like all exes, she didn't think about my feelings. I was really hurt because it made the whole thing feel like a business transaction. When I gave her that gift I never wanted anything in return. I did it because I cared for her deeply and I wanted to help in any way possible. But once she gave it back it was like none of that mattered.

Since she doesn't want you to give her the money I suggest you respect that. My advice is to put the money in a savings account for the next year that way if she changes her mind the money is there for her to take. If she never claims it within that time just donate it to a charity.

Oh and one last thing...she dumped me.