Well, here I am again, a week later from the problem with the girl... But you know, I need to move on. I need to remember that if I was going through that much trouble and was that uncomfortable, she's not the one God has chosen for me; or if you believe in something else, Karma.. Etc....

I need to better myself as a person, learn from this, become stronger, LOVE MYSELF MORE

Today in Chem lecture, she moved her seat to see better and left her phone on the desk. I was a curious dummy and went through her texts. I know it's bad but I needed to know what to do! So I find messages to this one guy (That she said she can't stand because all he talks about weight lifting and girls ALL THE TIME). She sent to him "I enjoyed the movie on Friday, and lunch, prince" (Which she told me she went to go see with her girl friends). But you know, I'm better than that! I don't need to feel bad. I shouldn't lower myself.

One needs to become the KING (or QUEEN respectively) of their life. I want to move on. Focus on my goals in life. Be successful. Success will be the best revenge. Perform my best!!!

*****ITS HARD THOUGH: Of course it is... It will be.. You loved the person! Believe me, as I'm typing this, my insides are churning and yearning and burning... BUT YOU MUST FIGHT THAT! Remember that it was their loss. Why should I love her if she's so foolish to chase something else. Yes SOMETHING! He deserves no name or title!

I'm going to start pursuing MY SELF (my hobbies, my happiness, my life).. NOT HER! I'm going to start working out, rock climbing, surfing, reading, playing guitar, running (all the things I used to do when I wasn't in love).

Next month, my other friend is having his birthday party, all of us will be there, including that guy. I will not feel pity for myself, but instead pity her for her silly choices. (I might even want to kick his butt after I get some alcohol in my system but I'll try not to!)

Anyways you should be happy with yourself without love. If I can do it, being the sucker I am, ANYONE can! You'll be the winner with this mindset!

TRUST: The past couple months have proved to me that I should trust no one. That guy was at some point my friend. My family and friends have all let me down, in these past months. I need to trust and depend on no one but my self, and of course God. I need to make it alone.

All of this has taught me a lot about life, and I want to end by apologizing to anyone I offended, or if you disagree with some, or all of this... I just came home from class, and said everything. This is my Philosophy... For now...


**Any comment, additions, questions? Please post, if you have thoughts or info that'll help others out there!**

wap

Nice to know, and it was interesting to read, as I am going through a bit of a rough patch.
It wasn't a good idea to go through the phone though. I did that and found a woman from his work had text him a photo of herself grrr. The less you know the better. It's a shame that you have to go to a party where they might be there. I avoided all social occasions that I thought he might be at. I still haven't seen him on a social occasion, nearly 9 months on. He may be at a leaving night next week, that I have to go to. I think it is all about trying to keep your head held high and keep your dignity. Don't let an ex or the people they are with get to you : )

Dani171986

Hi

I think thats a good way to think. Positive thoughts is always a good thing, you managed without this before you met her, and you will manage just fine as well without her. I think its true that the only person you can really rely on when it comes down to something is yourself. Can't always depend on others.
Reading what you had to say was quite uplifting to me. Rather than the usual can't live without this person stuff. Thinking about yourself and what is truly best for you.