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You all know my story, so I won't bore you. Suffice it to say, I haven't heard from the ex in almost 3 months...until today. I was on Yahoo messenger when she sends me an im asking me who I was (we didn't chat often on im). When I told her, she was kinds shocked, but didn't leave like I thought she would. We had a civil chat, although she said she felt awkward talking to me again (I gave her an out, but she didn't take it). It seemed like she didn't have much to say, but she replied saying that she had plenty, but didn't think it would be best to say it, as it would hurt both her and myself. She also said she wasn't sure how to feel. I kept it light and jovial, avoiding any relationship stuff. Ended the conversation by telling her it was nice to talk again and not to be a stranger.
Talking to her didn't bother me in the least! If anything, she seemed more bothered by it than me. After all these months of hoping and wondering, it happens when you least expect it. But I'm not phased, I'm in a better position than I ever have been before. She's welcome to be a part of my life, but I won't shed a tear if I never heard from her again.
Very refreshing.. you may have hoped at some point that she would break the no contact and she finally did but you are at a much better place now and although it may have been great to talk to her it wouldn't be the end of the world either way.
Very refreshing.. you may have hoped at some point that she would break the no contact and she finally did but you are at a much better place now and although it may have been great to talk to her it wouldn't be the end of the world either way.
Great to hear
True. It took me a while to believe this. But it's funny that she starts sniffing around now when other women have shown interest in me! Oh well, I'll continue to play it close to the vest, and live my life just like I have if she didn't break NC.
I'm in the same place as you, my ex also wants to "talk" to me all of a sudden of 3 months of NC. I don't know if it's a good idea to start having contact again but I guess it sure give you a lot of satisfaction just to know that she is more bothered than you.
Location: United Kingdom - usually cold and wet here!
Posts: 1,276
She has more of a reason to be bothered since she was the one who walked out on you, so there is more guilt there. I am glad blaze that you have come so far as to not be bothered by all this. I sense that there is a part of you that is reflecting on this contact but I think the progress you have made has enabled you to not let this pull you back in any way. It is good that you are in a place where you can consider letting other women in your life but just make sure that you really are in that place. You sound fine to me and I am very proud of the progress you have made since you first came here. I think you handled this situation very well and in a mature way. I would not dwell on it which I know you won't and just keep on doing what you are doing.
She has more of a reason to be bothered since she was the one who walked out on you, so there is more guilt there. I am glad blaze that you have come so far as to not be bothered by all this. I sense that there is a part of you that is reflecting on this contact but I think the progress you have made has enabled you to not let this pull you back in any way. It is good that you are in a place where you can consider letting other women in your life but just make sure that you really are in that place. You sound fine to me and I am very proud of the progress you have made since you first came here. I think you handled this situation very well and in a mature way. I would not dwell on it which I know you won't and just keep on doing what you are doing.
Yeah, I've reflected on this, but I try not to give her so much of my thought space (she's had enough). I chalk to it up to sheer curiosity, not any attempt to reconcile. I honestly don't think she'll ever talk to me again, but I've been wrong before. Either way, I'm in a better position than ever before.
I can't say it didn't bother me at all, but much less than I thought it would. I thought about just ignoring her, but I'd be doing to her what she did to me for all these months, and I wanted to show that I was above that. I'll try my best not to dwell on it.
Location: United Kingdom - usually cold and wet here!
Posts: 1,276
I'm curious though blaze, how did she even find you on MSN messenger? Surely she knew who she was IM'ing from the email address or contact name which is stored there.
Oh well, perhaps best not to dwell...You have done well my son!!
I'm curious though blaze, how did she even find you on MSN messenger? Surely she knew who she was IM'ing from the email address or contact name which is stored there.
Oh well, perhaps best not to dwell...You have done well my son!!
I've thought about that as well. I decided to give her the benefit of the doubt and assume she'd forgotten. For all I know she could have known exactly who I was and played dumb on purpose to see if I would say anything.
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