So I am very insecure and sometimes I feel bad about how I overreact to things in my relationship. Sometimes I really wonder if I'm overreacting or not. I live with my boyfriend and I don't know why I really don't trust him, but does anybody out there know of some ways that he can help me gain his trust? I feel so bad sometimes, because I know that these problems are MY personal problems and shouldn't have anything to do with him. My dad has been in and out of my life for my entire life. In and out of prison..... one crack whore to the next. City to city and I know that this is what has caused my trust issues in the past. I'm sick of freaking out when I find porn..... or freaking when he talks about his EXes in bed EW....... or when I think about the times that he has lied to me, or about the lies that he doesn't know that I know about. When I find things out I have a very hard time confronting him. I've always been a pleaser and I wouldn't want to make him upset knowing that I've gone through his phone and his e-mails. *sigh* ANYBODY OUT THERE KNOW OF SOEM ACTIVITIES THAT WE COULD DO TOGETHER TO HELP MY TRUST IN HIM?

thanks. I know that I'm ranting and this post may not make much sense.. but can anyone out there relate?

Homegirl 50

If you have no reason to trust him, if he does questionable things, why would you trust him? If he lies, and talks about his ex to you, does things you don't like, the problem is not you but him.
He can only help you gain trust by being trustworthy himself, and it does not sound like he is.

statictable

I got lost. Are you wanting your boy friend to gain trust in you? The stuff your dad was/is into and the stuff your boy friend is into is a little confusing; which does what? The 2 men sound much alike and if this is true you should instinctively not trust either and you should create distance between you and these zipper heads. If your serious about trust you first need to be able to trust yourself and I see that as your first priority. Good luck to you.