At Ask Me Help Desk you can ask questions in any topic and have them
answered for free by our experts. To ask questions or participate in
answering them you must register for a free account. By registering you
will be able to:
Get free answers from experts in any of our 300+
topics.
I just maid a mistake and broke up with her what do I do.
Me and my Ex-girlfriend have been together for 2 1/2 years now. In the begining like so many other relationships we were really into each other. With out haveing sex. When I met her she had an ex-boyfriend that she frequently visited in jail. I did'nt have a problem with it in the begining but as time went on I wanted it to stop and it did. Months went on and he finally got out and called her to see if he could see her since he was out of jail.(she met him while he was locked up so they never had a physical relationship). Of course she asked me and I said no. I never forgot that situation. Nor was I able to let it go. I treated her right and showed her I loved her (something she told me she never received from her ex's) and she still wanted to see him. S4 months into the relationship she begin to become less affectionate.We rarely had sex maybe 3 times a month. But we still loved each other very much. I constantly through the fact up that she went through hoops for the no good guys why not for me. She is a very shy person and its hard for her to express the way she feels. She was younger with those guy 21-22. And she use sex as a way to keep them. Now that shes older 27 and have someone that truly loves her she feels that she can be herself. I hated her for this. So I constantly through it in her face . Broke up with her three times to see if it would change. This last time we broke up she went to see her ex-boyfriend and she says she have feeling for him and isnt sure about us. The problems are we live together and I love her very much and I dont want to lose her What do I do?
I believe your ex is an ex for a reason. I agree with you, I don't think this girl has any buisness going to see her ex in jail or out of jail while she is with you. Why is she holding on to this guy, who treated her like crap?
Sometimes its a mystery how people are and why they make the decisions they do. For her to even say that she still has feelings for this guy tell me that she really doesn't know what she wants. It seems there have been quite a few posts about these similar situations lately and what I always tell peopl is, have a serious talk with her and ask her (point blank) "What do you want?" If she says I don't know then you can make the decision and let her go. Or if she says she needs time then you could give it to her, especially if you really love her. But don't wait forever this girl has to make a decision about this and not string you along. Its not fair and no one needs that.
If she does choose this guy then it will be very unfortunate since you have said that this guy wasn't really that great of a guy. But that is her decision, the one choice you have is to hold out and give her time or move on and that depends on how you feel about her and your relationship
Me and my Ex-girlfriend have been together for 2 1/2 years now. In the begining like so many other relationships we were really into each other. With out haveing sex. When I met her she had an ex-boyfriend that she frequently visited in jail. I did'nt have a problem with it in the begining but as time went on I wanted it to stop and it did. Months went on and he finally got out and called her to see if he could see her since he was out of jail.(she met him while he was locked up so they never had a physical relationship). Of course she asked me and I said no. I never forgot that situation. Nor was I able to let it go. I treated her right and showed her I loved her (something she told me she never received from her ex's) and she still wanted to see him. S4 months into the relationship she begin to become less affectionate.We rarely had sex maybe 3 times a month. But we still loved each other very much. I constantly through the fact up that she went through hoops for the no good guys why not for me. She is a very shy person and its hard for her to express the way she feels. She was younger with those guy 21-22. And she use sex as a way to keep them. Now that shes older 27 and have someone that truly loves her she feels that she can be herself. I hated her for this. So I constantly through it in her face . Broke up with her three times to see if it would change. This last time we broke up she went to see her ex-boyfriend and she says she have feeling for him and isnt sure about us. The problems are we live together and I love her very much and I dont want to lose her What do I do?
I already answered to your other post, so check there please. You don't need to post the same question twice, we will find you. Take care!
I must admit this is the first time I've every asked any one for advice. And you all have helped me in a BIG way. We have seen a counsler Monday. We plan on talking tonight to see what it is she wants to do. I must also say it was far from lust . I loved her for her mind first and then came the physical. I just want to be happy thats all. (Of course with her) but if it has to be with out (tears) I dont have much of a choice but to try and fight for her
You've been with her 2 1/2 years, you live together and yet she wants to see someone who she's only known as an incarcerated convict? Something's definitely wrong here. Stand your ground. This guy's off limits. As for that matter, so is any other guy given the seriousness of your relationship. If she can't be faithful to you and you alone after all this time then, as much as you may not want to hear it, she's not worth keeping. After all, how would she feel if the situation was reversed, if you were keeping company with a female convict? I bet she wouldn't like it very much.
I must admit this is the first time I've every asked any one for advice. And you all have helped me in a BIG way. We have seen a counsler Monday. We plan on talking tonight to see what it is she wants to do. I must also say it was far from lust . I loved her for her mind first and then came the physical. I just want to be happy thats all. (Of course with her) but if it has to be with out (tears) I dont have much of a choice but to try and fight for her
Hope you did read the other answer in the thread you posted before. Remember, she's used to being used and also used to using her body one way or the other - she needs therapy and if you are willing to stick with her and help her, then great. Be warned though, that it will take her a long time to understand that there are people out there that don't just plan to use her, and it will confuse her for a while. When in that circle - it's hard to get out of it - it's like a re-birth. I wish you a lot of luck in your goal and hope you've got the strength to handle it, dear. Please keep us posted - we'll be here for you.
Good luck in helping her find her real self and gain confidence - not many men would stick around thru this trial.
Linear Mode
