| hurt confusion chlamydia
Ok, I meet this guy david everything is going great. On the 7th date we sleep together and then three days later I had my annual(pap smear). I had my pap smear on the Wednesday. Then on the Friday the Clinic called me in the evening. Ive never been called before. I was scared but I did could not call them till the Monday. So I went on with my weekend with David. So then Monday morning first thing I do is call the clinic and they tell me I have chlamydia. I was scared cause David and I did not use a condom. Two months before meeting David I had to go to the clinic for a morning after pill. Cause my boyfriend of 3 months told me the condom slipped so they checked me for everything then also. I had to go back to the clinc for a check up after that a month later because of the pills made me sick also and they did another smear test. So I had been checked twice prior to meeting David. Back to David. So I call him we are at work and he wanted to know straight away so I told him. His initial response was we can make it through this. I agreed and honestly at that point I knew I loved him. Then later that day I called him and he went ballistic on me telling the procdure men go through to be checked. I did not know cause Ive never had it before and iam not a man. Believe me women do not enjoy pap smears either. Anyhow I told him Iam sorry and apologized and continue to listen to his taunting. I then spoke to him later at home and he said he did not want to talk to me for the next three weeks. I said that I wanted to be there for him and Iam so sorry please dont do this. He continued to scoll me. I felt I deserved it. Then two days went by and I thought I cant take this anymore I packed a bag of cds he gave me and gave them back to him. I also put my medical records in the bag proving to him I did not have chlamydia until I met him. When he got the medical records he was pissed he called me and asked me too meet him outside for coffee I did. He said he did not understand it and did not want it my medical records. I read it too him. He said we were both to blame I agreed. I honestly felt we still cared for each other too much to give up. We went our seperate ways that day. I later emailed him to meet me in the week. He said he would if he could. Later that week he sent me an email saying that we dont want the same things and he feels its better we go our seperate ways. I felt a lot of pain hurt. So my co-worker saw it on my face and asked if i wanted to go for a walk. We did and I run into David. I asked him to speak to me he stopped and I asked if we can remain friends. He reluctanly said yes. That day I got fired from work also and a death happened in my family all on the same day. So then I tried to communicate with him cause I wanted him back. I left to another job a week later. I called emailed and not answer so then I remember how he kind of chased me at the start of the relationship. So I sent him a present every week. On the third week I called him and he asked me where I was I told him I got another job in another town. He was in San Francisco and my new job was in L.A. So I told him, I asked him if he liked the presents and he said "Yes if they were not coming from me". I was devastated, but I felt ok . I will keep trying cause nothing has ever come easy for me so I will continue to fight to get him back. He requested I never send him anything again. I havent since. That was July 2004. Id email him from time to time. I called him in Sept on his birthday. He was really nice and sweet and flirted with me it was like old times. I was so hurt after that day cause i knew then hes toying with my feelings. I sent him an email saying if you want to be friends lets be or dont ever talk or email me fine. His answer was we can be friends but lets take it slow. Well iam still in L.A. and now hes in Montreal. I dont know how slow slow we can go. In New Years I flew to Montreal hoping to see him and to hang out with friends. I did hang out with friends but he said hed try and meet me for dinner. He never showed up. So since I knew some friends of ours I brought his gift to give to them to give to him. I instead run into David as soon as I walk in the door. I speak to him for 2 mins he said he was too busy and I give him his gift. I then proceeded to the airport that evening he called me and thanked me for the gift. I was happy cause even if i did not see him i was closing the door. I thought it was closed. In January my best friend died also from Montreal. I called David and asked him to get the Newspaper article of my friend for me. He said he did. I sent him an email thanking him and as i wrote the email my feelings of all the things i liked about him came out. He wrote back a cheerful sweet email and said he will send my articiale soon. Then on March 17th St Pats I went out with my girlfriends had a few drinks and sent him and email saying I dream of him every night and I know my heart will heal. Also saying The first cut is the deepest. I was tipsy and Iam ashamed of the email. My problem is its been almost a year. We met in June the first week by the third week of June we were over. Percisely 14 days . Iam in love with him, I want to move on HELP>>>>> I dont know... All I know is that this pain is killing me. I dont like it....I dont blame him or anyone else... I just want to be me again strong and move on... by the way Ive also been jobless for about 8 months as well when I worked in L.A for 4 months I still thought of him every day.
Any advice will be greatful
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