How do I get the point across? She doesn't seem to get it!

Ceasefire · #1 Sep 18, 2007, 04:03 PM

I'm a 17 year old guy (nearly 18) Senior in high school. I am strongly attracted to a 15 year old girl, a Sophomore in high school. It's not just a physical attraction, we like the same type of music, we are both reserved or shy, and enjoy writing. One of my close friends tried to get to know her last year because he was attracted to her as well, she immediately said no because he came on way too strong. I liked her last year but said nothing in order to bypass a fight with my friend over a girl. It has been a year since then and he is no longer attracted to her, and gave me the "Ok" to talk to her. I added her on MSN and Facebook, and have tried talking to her, but she responds with simple answers, making hard to keep any form of a conversation going. I don't think she would be comfortable for me to talk to her at school since she is very reserved and I am a senior, which is why I chose to talk to her through the computer.

My question is, should I come out with it that I like her? Should I give her a note that simply explains it? Should I talk to her friends about what I should do?

I am trying to be as non-aggressive as possible, being too forward was my friend's problem, and I can't risk it.

ilovcali · Sep 18, 2007, 04:15 PM

Well, frankly, I remember my senior year of high school. I had already been accepted to a college so my main interest was having fun. You'll be gone next year, remember that before getting too serious with anyone. It seems that if you want to chase someone your senior year, it should be for fun, not something too serious. Chase someone who wants to be chased and ENJOY IT!

But that is my 2 cents and I'm sure many might disagree. But being a senior in high school happens only once. And it should be a really fun time. You shouldn't add any type of relationship stress.

But if you really do like this girl, ask her out with a group of friends. And also MAKE SURE to tell her to invite some of her friends too. This will make her more comfortable. Then it's NOT A DATE. It's HANGING OUT. Shy people tend to be ok with HANGING OUT but WORRY ABOUT DATING.

So maybe you get your friends together and she gets hers, and you all go do something together. Just give her some extra attention when you're in the group. Good luck.

--Cali

Ceasefire · Sep 18, 2007, 04:27 PM

I plan on going to a community college in town for two years, meaning she would graduate when I am finishing my second year, so I don't mind if things get serious, I'll be here.

I've also been without a relationship since junior high, and I feel so lonely. My friends have all talked about girls they've liked or wanted to date for the past three years. This girl came along and I can't stop thinking about her. I'm not the kind of guy who wants several short relationships, I'd rather have one good one.

I don't think I was very clear on the shyness factor either. She will not talk to ANYONE except for 4-5 people at school, her closest friends. My friends absolutely hate her friends for their own reasons, so us all hanging out would be very difficult.

I guess I just need a second opinion on whether I should talk to her friends about what I should do, such as asking them if she's single (which I already know she is) or asking them to tell her I like her (immature for a senior I know). Or if I should just tell her myself. Casual conversation is not working, despite popular opinion from everyone I've asked.

GlindaofOz · Sep 18, 2007, 04:48 PM

She's 15 and you are almost 18?

What are the consent laws in your state? I'd check that out before pursuing this relationship any further.

Ceasefire · Sep 18, 2007, 04:49 PM

Consent to date? Is that even a law? I don't mean to sound ignorant, and I assume you are talking about sex. I thank you for your concern, but I am not anything like most teenagers when it comes to peer pressure. I adhere to authority and I know and understand the consequences of my actions prior to acting. I also am a firm believer in the idea of abstinence and I am strongly opposed to premarital sex.

GlindaofOz · Sep 18, 2007, 04:51 PM

Well if you plan on touching her in any fashion you may want to make sure you don't end up labeled a pedophile or land in jail by pursuing this relationship.

blondiE-MO · Oct 7, 2007, 12:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ceasefire

I'm a 17 year old guy (nearly 18) Senior in high school. I am strongly attracted to a 15 year old girl, a Sophomore in high school. It's not just a physical attraction, we like the same type of music, we are both reserved or shy, and enjoy writing. One of my close friends tried to get to know her last year because he was attracted to her as well, she immediately said no because he came on way too strong. I liked her last year but said nothing in order to bypass a fight with my friend over a girl. It has been a year since then and he is no longer attracted to her, and gave me the "Ok" to talk to her. I added her on MSN and Facebook, and have tried talking to her, but she responds with simple answers, making hard to keep any form of a conversation going. I don't think she would be comfortable for me to talk to her at school since she is very reserved and I am a senior, which is why I chose to talk to her through the computer.

My question is, should I come out with it that I like her? Should I give her a note that simply explains it? Should I talk to her friends about what I should do?

I am trying to be as non-aggressive as possible, being too forward was my friend's problem, and I can't risk it.

I Don't Think It's Illegal Unless You Guys Are Having Sex
Consesual Or Not
Then You Could Get In Hell Of Trouble

Wish I Could Be More Of Help

Love,
blondiE-MO



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