i am so hurt and i feel like i will never got over it. i fear my ex may have his eye on someone already and it is killing me. i am dreading the moment i hear that they are together. why after two years does he think its ok to get with someone straight away? help me i feel like i will never get over this.
It depends... if you loved him and he was your first love. You'll never get over it, you will in a sense that you will move on and be happy with someone else but some where deep in you it will still hurt. My advise is... LOOK AROUND YOU!!! If he is already looking that means you can too! There are plenty of attractive and nice guys out there. It took me a while to get over one of my ex's that really did break my heart and I thought I'd never find anyone but now I'm with the most wonderful man and I love him with my entire being. So don't worry about this , you'll find someone new and better! And that guy is who will help mend your broken heart.
dear, i've broken up with my ex for 4 years and still i'm not over him..sometimes, there are some whom we can never really get over with...just gotta press on every day and hope that we get better..the heart will heal..slowly and surely..but you gotta want to make it heal.. *hugs* a broken heart is never easy..
I know what you just how you feel thisisjo, I am sorry for your pain. I know it hurts. I am feeling it as well. It kills me ALOT. All I can tell you is that dissappear as much as possible. Dont even try to contact him. I know it is hard, I am so confused right now also. The advice everyone is giving me is helping me on here. I love my gf with all that I am, she broke my heart and is seeing someone else also. It is a pain I cant fathom. It will get better, just try to focus on simple thngs and for gods sake dont let your imagination run wild. I hope things get better for you, I dont think mine will. I pray all of us get better that are hurting right now.
Quite honestly you can not control somebody elses actions. Another thing is that this person is an EX, so there is a reason for it and whatever happens with this ex and other people is not really important and should not be. Each individual has different ways of dealing with loss and some people are not able to be alone. As for the heartache it takes time. Can not expect it to be over night, but I guarantee you one thing. It is the choices you make and things that you do in your life which will determine how to learn from this experience, how to move on, and taking time for yourself and enjoy being single. I do not mean go out to the bars and mess up your life but what I mean is to do things that are important for you. Volunteering, or education, hobbies, etc.... believe me this pain will pass and down the road you will be thankful for this experience because you will come out a stronger person because of it.
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Hi, sorry to hear about what you are going through. I have been there and was just over a year ago. I was so broken hearted it knocked me for six. I came here for help and advice and I got so much support both here and in my life. It took a lot of grieving and positive thinking. It was really hard and I mean really hard but I pulled through after around 8 or 9 months and I am much, much stronger now. I can't tell you how much the people on this website helped me and how I got myself back sometimes you sometimes lose when you are hopelessly in love with someone that may or may not be right for you...I can assure you that you will get over this and get through all the anger, resentment, emotional and physical pain that occurs post breakup. It takes a lot of time and I mean a lot of time, it varies from person to person and how emotionally invested you were. I was with my ex for 3 years and allowed myself at least 2 months per year but ideally speaking, its not good to give yourself a timescale...You are over it when you are over it.
Okay, now I have reassured you that you will get through it, because you really will, here is the practical advice that should help you.
The ex will be in your head 24-7 for quite some time to come. This is a huge loss for you!! What you must do now to help yourself heal from this loss is to:
1.) Maintain NO CONTACT -- NO LETTERS, E-MAILS, PHONE CALLS, TEXTS, NOTHING!!
2.) Keep yourself busy, go to the gym, take up an old hobby, spend time with friends and relatives, whatever..Try to avoid alcohol where possible (it won't help)
3.)Try not to dwell on the past too much, focus on what you can do for yourself to improve you, as a person. Perhaps you have lost part of who you were before you met your ex. Try to establish what this was and get it back.
Accept that the ex is gone!! Chasing them and telling them that things will change will not work. Believe me, I know it won't, others on here have done it and I have too!! Does not work like this!!
By the way, after all this time, regarding my breakup I finally began to realise a few months ago that I never would want my ex back. Not because of what she did but because I know what I want in a woman and love is blind you know, it really is. That is not to say that I am saying I am better than her but that I feel that we were not right for each other anyway and she was not the one. If someone would have told me that I would be saying this a year ago, I would not have believed them. Opening your eyes to what is right for you when you are hopelessly in love with someone is hard,
Used in this way it can be a strange word hopelessly but I hope you understand what I mean.
Whenever you need any advice or you are feeling down, come on here and talk, believe me these guys and gals offer great advice and they have helped me immensely and they will help you too!!
When you feel ready, perhaps consider joining in discussions and helping others who are going through the same thing here. it is immensly powerful and I can't believe how much it helped me to help others while going through some tough times myself. Try it and you may be surprised by how it helps you.
I wish you well and hope that your healing starts soon!!
My girl left me for someone else back in August, and it has been 2+ months of hell. Each week got better and better though. It is super important to keep a positive outlook on your life and future though (this was so hard for me because I used to be such a negative person). Fake it until you make it really. Positive thoughts and actions will make you happier quicker. Thats not to say you cant grieve because you will. But try and set some mini goals for yourself and be proud of yourself when you achieve them.
You HAVE to let go of the thoughts about him with someone else. From the moment they left your life it stopped mattering what they did and who they did it with. You have to stop putting yourself in places where you might find info about him and what he is doing as well, at least for the first while. I remember having my ex on facebook still and the day she added someone else as her boyfriend it was like a knife through the heart. I blocked her and from that day onwards things got better.
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