Hello everyone,

I've been broken up with my ex for a little over a month now, and while I have maintained NC with her, save when she has talked to me a couple of times, I find myself constantly checking her Facebook page.

I want to see who is writing on her wall, what she is up to, etc.

Also, there are a number of pictures (that we have both added) of us that I find myself gazing at far too often.

I am tempted to take down the pictures that I have put up of us, and maybe even remove our Facebook "friendship."

However, while I still care deeply for her, the breakup was not angry or violent or anything, and I know that she wants to remain friends.

I have never deleted a slew of pictures on Facebook before, and/or "cancelled" a friendship on it. I know it sounds like of silly, but at least for my 20 something generation, I could see such actions as being a pretty large snub.

That said, should I delete the pictures for my own well-being, or perhaps just try to have better will-power and avoid looking at them (but leave them online)?

Thanks for any suggestions that you may have.

clandestine1

I was in the same predicament a few months ago, and felt like I was being petty for deleting my ex from facebook. That was until the mini-feed came in saying, "*insert name here* has changed his relationship status to In a Relationship." Then, the ones from mutual friends writing on his wall...

When I deleted him, I asked myself why I should care so much if it bothered him that I deleted him? Honestly, it was like saying, I'm protecting myself from being hurt any more. Its a way of saying I accept your decision, but I don't have to be sitting in the front row to get it. Stop torturing yourself, because chances are the day will come when you'll see something you really don't want to and you'll wish like hell you'd done it sooner.

Just my opinion, do what you feel is right...

samesame

Stay off of facebook! I deleted my account 2 weeks ago for the same reasons as you and it's made a huge difference. Don't torture yourself. Whenever you're on it you will have the temptation to look at her profile and it will only cause your unwanted grief. Avoid it as much as you can.

aqaie

Thanks for your opinion.

I am worried that removing the friendship won't really serve much of a purpose, and I should try to just exercise some self-restraint first.

If that fails, though, I may have to just remove it entirely.

Thanks for your reply.

It's reassuring to know that others grapple with the same issue.

I'll see if I can't manage to avoid checking her page without actually removing the friendship online.

Jiser

Delete her profile and her friends profile + friendship from your account. Relationship is over for w/e reason. She or you wanted it over so accept it. Maybe you can be friends but not until you are both over each other, which takes time, longer for others. When you can safely see your ex with someone else with no feelings you no your over them.