His children over me?

s_cianci · Nov 21, 2006, 08:01 PM

How old are his children? How often does he see or talk with them? My guess is, not very often so he makes them a top priority when they do call. That doesn't mean you don't rate or are unimportant. Given the circumstances, I'd cut him some slack in this area, at least for right now. Don't be too upset or bothered by the fact that he ends a conversation with you in order to take a call from one of his kids. After all, if it was your kids calling, what would you do? Probably the same thing, I bet. Now if he does it when anybody calls, then you may have a problem that'll need to be addressed.

DrJ · Nov 21, 2006, 08:06 PM

Rule #1: don't ever... Ever, ever, ever, EVER.... Expect to be a higher priority than someone's children.

Don't feel bad for being the next in line. That is as high as you can ever be. Don't ever make someone choose between their children and you... You will undoubtedly lose... And if you don't lose... Well, I wouldn't want someone that chose me over their own children.

Allheart · Nov 22, 2006, 12:56 AM

Oh how I agree Dr.

Instead of feeling you have been placed lower on his list, try and look at it through different eyes. What a great man who has such love for his children. That is a man you want in your life and is something to respect and admire.

I would be more than concerened and a bit put off by a man who did not give his heart to his children.

You may have a very good one there, try and look at it through different eyes.

Do not put yourself in a position that you compete with his children. Your relationship with him is on an entirely different level.

Sentra · Nov 22, 2006, 04:49 AM

You aren't falling down the list. You are ON the list. The children may come first, but he doesn't love you any less. If he didn't love you, he wouldn't be with you, so no worries.

valinors_sorrow · Nov 22, 2006, 06:09 AM

If love is a competition, it ceased being love somewhere in the mix.

talaniman · Nov 22, 2006, 07:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ttleas

I need help because when we are on the phone, if one of his children calls... Its an immediate hangup... Give me advise for felling so down on his list.

Thats the way it is supposed to be. You must not have kids right?

Wildcat21 · Nov 22, 2006, 09:06 AM

YEP! Children come first - that's pretty selfish on your part. You might want to re-think that. His kids and even his work/company may coem before you.

SOrry to say - in a healthy relationship you should never come first - his world should NOT revolve around you - if you feel that way you will only have heartache and sorrow.

HIS KIDS SHOULD ALWAYS COME FIRST UNTIL THEY ARE ADULTS - And I really consider most adults at about age 30.

sarah louise · Nov 22, 2006, 05:38 PM

I can really say a lot but his kids come first and always will it will never change do your best and don't let it get to you hun

ciaobella · Feb 8, 2008, 05:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ttleas

I need help because when we are on the phone, if one of his children calls... Its an immediate hangup... Give me advise for felling so down on his list.

Thye are his children darl children always come first just ask him to ring you back when he is finished talking to his children don't let it get you down

His children over me?

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