Is it a hint?

Dumped and still in love · #1 Jul 16, 2007, 06:55 AM

He broke up with me 3 weeks ago. We agreed on no contact until we are over each other. However, he has smsed me at least once every week (3 times in total): He informed me of a theatre production that I would enjoy (sms), to tell me that we'd spent 2 weeks apart (sms), and the last time was to tell me about an interesting website (IM).

Is he regreting his decision?

He broke up with me out of the blue and when I asked him why, he seemed to be making up an excuse to justify his actions. I suspect he broke up with me at the spur of the moment, since we had a little tiff, but is now too stubborn to admit his mistake.

Should I do something?

GoldieMae · Jul 16, 2007, 06:59 AM

Dependong on how well you know him, have you considered asking him if he misses you? Maybe ask him: "I was wondering, since we said no contact, does it mean you miss me?" I seriously doubt this guy is over you.

huno · Jul 16, 2007, 07:20 AM

He may have had a reason to break up with you that he couldn't tell you about, such as interest in another girl. That is probably unlikely, but it may be. I mention this because I think it's strange that he broke up without giving you a good reason.

In any case, though, he may want to get back together. Why not be the one to suggest it? We men are ego-driven creatures... we don't like to admit mistakes, and so we're grateful when girls let us weasel out of responsibility for our blunders.

Tell him you want to give it another shot. It couldn't hurt.

nicespringgirl · Jul 16, 2007, 08:07 AM

I hate it when there is mind games and all the guesses...it seems relationship is so complicated, I don't know if I am interested in guys any more!
Maybe I should go back being ambitious like no one's business, forcus on work!!!

Dumped and still in love · Jul 17, 2007, 09:47 AM

Hi everyone. Thanks for the replies! Here's an update of the situation:

I asked if he did want to get back together with me, and he started telling me about how miserable life is without me and that he thinks he might going in to a depression.

Then he said that although he was the one to break up with me, he shouldn't be deciding everything in the relationship. So he said that I was to decide if we should get back together. But that came with a warning, "You will be responsible for my actions in the future that are a result of my unfulfilled desires, should you choose to get back together with me." His unfulfilled desires being the things he wants, but that I do not possess.

He said that since we're both already 20, if we get back together, he will surely marry me. Then he asked me to give him reasons as to why he should marry me, to "CONVINCE" him...

I think he doesn't know what he wants, but is too much of a coward to admit it. And he's too much of a coward to admit his mistake. Why should I have to beg him to get back together with me? if anyone should be begging, it should be him.

Capuchin · Jul 17, 2007, 09:59 AM

Ouch, he's saying a lot of strange things that don't make sense.

You're absolutely right. You need to prove nothing to him. I say you start no-contact again. For his sake. He needs to heal. And i'm sur eyou need to a little too.

Dumped and still in love · Jul 17, 2007, 10:20 PM

Should I check on him and ask if everything is fine at home? His reason for not wanting to be together with me is not very consistent. Plus, he's so depressed now without me.

drmskhalil · Jul 17, 2007, 11:39 PM

'Nobody is perfect'-This is a fact. Everybody has some flaws. I think he misses you, that is why he contacted you even after breaking up with you, but there may be some mistakes on your part which must be corrected. Nobody breaks up without a reason, there may be some things troubling him, but due to the fact that he loves you, he couldn't stay without contacting you. I think you must ask him what the things are, discuss the problems and then decide if you want to restart the relation or not. I wish you all the best anyway and hope this answer helps!

AKaeTrue · Jul 17, 2007, 11:49 PM

I'm not so sure I'd suggest for you (or anyone) to be with someone who feels
that they don't fulfill their every desire because of the things they don't have...
Plus he wants you to convince him to be with you...thats wrong.
Those are some pretty mean comments.

You know more about him and his situation and if you wanted to call and check on him it would be a nice gesture on your part



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