Lost my password. Anyway, after 10 months we broke up. During spring break, we spent every night together (4 nights). The fifth night I told him my friend was in town. Since he had his daughter, I figured I would chat on the phone with my friend. At 7:00 p.m. I called and told him this. He said he was picking up his daughter, okay. At 9:30, he shows up at my house and said oh, here's the tickets for the museum. (I was going the next day) I was shocked he showed up. He said his daughter was in the car, bye.

I called him 10 minutes later to thank him and he said you looked like a different person, in a very hostile voice. I said I was just shocked to see him. Anyway, he hung up on me. Don't know why. I text him at 2:00 in the morning, after talking to my girlfriend all night. I told him I loved him, goodnight. The next morning he text me and asked if I had a good night with my friend and her boyfriend, insinuating something perverted. I got pissed. I text him back and said call me if you want, I don't want to text. I never even saw them that night.

Anyway, that day went to the museum with family. My friend left for Jamaica. He text me all day, "having fun yet?". I couldn't believe it. I was pissed. I didn't even respond. This was Thursday. He later that evening asked what my plans were. I told him I was working since I didn't work all day. From then on, I got nasty text messages, him making all kinds of accusations of inappropriate behavior on my part. I was so mad. For a week we were horrible towards each other, being mean to each other (by texts only). There was so much animosity. I thought, this isn't me. I felt like he was bringing something out of me that I never knew was in me. All the meanness.

Anyway, after a week of this, I called him and tried to talk about why was this happening. He told me I waited too long to call him and it was over. I said there was so much animosity, that communication was totally cut off. We need to work on this and figure out why this happened. He said it's too late, I should have called him that Thursday and talked to him. (I was mad and didn't want to.) I hung up and said forget it. For another week he text me and was still mean. I tried again to call him and tried to communicate, but he wouldn't. Finally, after 2 weeks, on Saturday, he was calmed down and called and said it can never go back to how it was, but we can be friends. He acted like nothing ever happened. He told me it was my fault for not trying harder to talk to him. He was back to the person I met when we were just friends. I'm dumbfounded. This is all confusing to me. He's been calling to say hi, like have casual conversation, like we're friends. (two minute conversations) No discussion of what happened.

I text him two days ago and told him I can't talk to him anymore, I need to get my head together and that I can't be friends with him either. He called all day yesterday. I finally answered. He told me I still care about you, it just can't be how it was, but he wants to be good friends. I told him I had to go and hung up. This guy, I think, is a sociopath. None of this makes sense.

We always had a good time together. There were a few times that he insinuated that I had been with other guys, but I dismissed them after telling him he was the only one for me, I never cheated on him. He would let it go and we'd be fine.

Does anyone find this behavior bizarre? Am I crazy? He blames it on me, that I messed everything up.

SusanMD

Today, 5/1, he called and left a very hateful message, says he has so much anomisity, Doesn't want anything to do with me. I haven't called or texted him. Why does he call just to try to argue or push my buttons? He just left a text message, 20 minutes ago, calling me all kinds of names. If he hates me so much, why is he calling and texting? Why not just leave me alone like I have done him. I have no desire to waste my time on telling him how he messed up. You all have the best advice and knowledge about these things. I feel if I don't respond or answer, he'll eventually give up. What do you think?

talaniman

That's the idea, and what you would expect a normal person to do. For your own protection, recognize he is not normal, and maybe dangerous, and you should be alert, and prepared to call in some help, like the cops, if this behavior continues. His texts are evidence.

HistorianChick

Sweetie, Go to the police. You don't have to take out a warrant or anything... just go. Talk to an officer. They will make a report and that will be it. Its what I did after the messages started getting mean and caustic. Seriously... you need to do this to get your mindset back that you are in control, that you made the right decision, that you have the power to resist.

Seriously. Go. They won't have you do anything that you don't want to do (i.e., make an official request for a warrant). But it will be on record.

He will not give up until you give him reason to give up. At least that's what happened for me.

Sad Soul

His texts will get far worse because he wants to provoke a response from you. He's desperate for you to communicate to him, even if it means for him to be cruel or monstrous. Whatever you do, DO NOT GIVE HIM HIS FIX, aka do not message him or call him.

Do not contact him. Crazy creeps love attention from their victims, whether it's good or bad. He's just desperate to get a text, because even "hate" means you have some sort of feeling for him. To "hate" someone actually gives that person a lot of control over your brain and world.

Be alert. Don't ever meet up with him (even if he says he's on his death bed). I suspect he will be getting crazier. Someone who leaves crazy texts without minding the trail of harassment evidence he leaves behind, is sick in the head. He knows what he's doing is wrong, but doesn't care. He's a sociopath, like you said. Stay away and continue being as cautious as you are.

Chery

Hey there Susan. It's been a while since we've heard from you.

How are you doing? is this guy leaving you alone? Please give us a follow-up as soon as you can, dear.