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Ok, now I'm really confused! As some of you know I recently told my ex-girlfriend how I wanted to start seeing her again and possibly get back together. She told me she still thought about me all the time and missed me, however she was enjoying her freedom and being single right now. This weekend I'm going out on the town with some buddies, she's going out as well with her girlfriends. This is where I get confused. Last night she called me and said, "hey after you are done with your buddies on Saturday night, we should get a hotel room downtown and have sex." So my question is can she get together with me, have sex, and have no emotional feelings after our 2 year history together. Especially since the breakup was pretty much my doing and we've only been broken up for two months. Could this be her way of easing back into a relationship with me? She's not at all the slutty type, she's never had a one night stand, only relationships, which also makes me wonder what this sex could mean to her???? Please help! Thanks!
In conjunction with your other posts, it strikes me that she wants to be back in a relationship with you too.
Offering sex is one way to try and make the relationship more appealing.
Sex without strings attached is truely rare.... Maybe not impossible, but almost always grows into an emotional bond that gets blurred after a few "encounters"... and then the strings appear.
There's no way to know exactly what's going on in her head. She probably doesn't really know at this point.
I will say that hooking up for what looks like a one night stand in order to ease back into a relationship is a Bad Idea (TM). You're already in strange territory with the whole maybe getting back together maybe not stuff floating around, and to add in sex outside of a relationship framework at this point is just going to confuse things further.
She COULD be going for no-strings-attached sex just because she has an itch and knows you're a safe source for scratching it.
Me and my ex broke up nearly 2 months ago. I spk 2 him las nite on myspace for the 1st time in weeks and all these feelings came flooding back to me! If I slept with him now I would definaltly fall for him all over again!
If she says she misses u and she wants sex she must want u still!! thats the onli reason y i wud want to meet my ex!! no strings sex with an ex of 2years wud be difficult to bottle up emotions!! ... I think anyway
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IT may be her way of easing back into a relationship but it isnt a very mature or healthy way in my opinion. What abotu she just talk to you about her feelings and where you guys are headed.
But it could also be that she simply wants to have sex with you. She may have a that little of emotional attachment left for you that she is comfortable to simply have sex with you, knowing you will say yes, and then up and leave and go back to her single life without you. That is a big possibility in my opinion.
If i were you i would be politely declining her offer saying you dont want to be used as just some sex object as your feelings for her run deeper than that!
Have sex with her...especially if you still like her
But make sure you don't make the sex such a big deal and try to smother her to get back together. You already made it known that it is what you want. You have her where you want her in my opinion because she knows what you want.
What I would do and I know this would work is to hook up with her but don't act like you need it all the time. Because she will be confused and after a while of hooking she will either ask to come back to you or you will figure this girl isn't for you. Either way I think you will have the decision.
It almost seems to me due to the fact that she pointed out that she is "enjoying her freedom" that this girl may have gotten a taste of the "single life". What I mean by that is dating different guys, getting the attention she needs but when it comes to sex, you are familiar and "safe" so to speak. I am sure you can bet that while she is out with the girls that night she will be flirting with anyone who shows a slight interest, but she has the security there at the end of the night to say, I am going home alone and then come to see you to fulfull her needs. Believe it or not guys, there are some of us women out there that actually do enjoy sex as much as men do!!! Not all of us associate it with love.
Have sex with her...especially if you still like her
But make sure you don't make the sex such a big deal and try to smother her to get back together. You already made it known that it is what you want. You have her where you want her in my opinion because she knows what you want.
What I would do and I know this would work is to hook up with her but don't act like you need it all the time. Because she will be confused and after a while of hooking she will either ask to come back to you or you will figure this girl isn't for you. Either way I think you will have the decision.
Your posts Nohitter continue to lead me to believe that you still think this is all a big game and if you play it right it will work out in your favour.
Without hijacking the thread i just want to say that it certainly isnt the case and people who play games and think they have people where they want them invariably lose and find out the hard way that games are for children!
Have sex with her...especially if you still like her
But make sure you don't make the sex such a big deal and try to smother her to get back together. You already made it known that it is what you want. You have her where you want her in my opinion because she knows what you want.
What I would do and I know this would work is to hook up with her but don't act like you need it all the time. Because she will be confused and after a while of hooking she will either ask to come back to you or you will figure this girl isn't for you. Either way I think you will have the decision.
I can't recommend against this course of action strongly enough.
If you do this, you're doing it on her terms. If she's not interested in getting back together, you're letting her use you, and you're going to be even more interested in her because you've added this aspect of the relationship back in. If she is interested, then by doing this before getting back together, you've lost any chance at keeping a stable definition of the relationship.
Stay away, and only go back to being intimate on your terms. Anything else is selling yourself out for a booty call.
You still have feelings so the friends with benefits game is out. It will only retard your healing, and keep you off a healthy path. Her agenda is so unimportant, and her motives are irrelevant as your well being must be first. Say NO to her, and keep your power!!!!
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