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Home > Family & People > Relationships   »   help for a friend

 
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Old Jul 14, 2006, 07:24 AM
flower81
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help for a friend

My friend was upset a little bit she said about this :-

If your boyfriend tells you, “this girl at this bar started dancing with me, I told her to keep her space as I have a girl friend” which is great
She says “so” and he moves away.
Anyway I asked if she was pretty and he said “yes”
I said “ prettier than me “ he said “ well to some men she may be prettier “ !!!

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Old Jul 14, 2006, 08:48 AM   #2  
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So, what is your friend's question?

Should she be upset because he danced near someone in a public place where dancing does take place.

Is she upset because he didn't walk away from the dance floor, or is she upset because they were at this place that give people a chance to do just that... dance.

Is she upset because she asked a very insecure question?.... A girl who is sure of her boyfriend and his feelings for her, should never put him in the spot and ask 'is she prettier than me?." That is childish. I think the answer he gave was good - because it was the absolute truth.

If she does not like to be confronted with 'eventualities' in public, she should not place herself in the precarious position.

The only things possible here are:

a) get rid of him if she can't trust him

b) stay at home when he goes out (that will make her think of worse scenarios, but that's her problem)

c) stay at home with him and think of something fun to do there (a movie, dinner, good sex, etc)

d) lock him up and never let him out

You've been in her shoes yourself a few times, so what would you suggest.

Lots of luck, flower, and I hope you can help her.


Setting oneself up for a fall is self-destruction and self-doubt.

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phillysteakandcheese agrees: The friend does seem to have put him in a very precarious position.
flower81 agrees: thanks so much Chery for all your help
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Old Jul 14, 2006, 04:34 PM   #3  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by flower81
My friend was upset a little bit she said about this :-

If your boyfriend tells you, “this girl at this bar started dancing with me, I told her to keep her space as I have a girl friend” which is great
She says “so” and he moves away.
Anyway I asked if she was pretty and he said “yes”
I said “ prettier than me “ he said “ well to some men she may be prettier “ !!!
And the question would be..............................................?
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Old Jul 14, 2006, 04:56 PM   #4  
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Tell her to grow up.............................and not to ask questions she may not want the answer to. Very stupid. See this is why some guys fail to tell some women things like this! He did something upstanding, and got the 3rd degree for it because he was honest!! My guess is he wouldnt tell "your friend" if this happened again.....I wouldnt. Very sad.

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flower81 agrees: i did too
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Old Jul 15, 2006, 01:47 PM   #5  
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From my understanding, your friend is upset b/c her bf told this girl that some men may consider her (the gf) prettier than the stranger.

Tell her to give it a break.

If she is that insecure, she shouldn’t be in a relationship in the first place.

Yes, she is pretty, but not all men find her pretty. Is this something the bf should go around lying?

In fact, anyone who thinks they are the prettiest thing is a bit stuck up.

Relax, if the guy isn’t cheating, then just drop it. Why make problems where none really exist?
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Old Jul 16, 2006, 04:51 PM   #6  
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Im with you Jeff
i dont think her boyfriend could have handled this situation any better than he did. he was honest, up front and has done nothing wrong in the slightest..
i actually feel sorry for this guy that he has your friend as a girlfriend. he must put up with, or will in the future some serious crap (such as this) from her.
or is there reason for her to disbelieve him???
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Old Jul 18, 2006, 01:52 AM   #7  
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Im glad i got all these kind of responses.
I told my friend to take a chill pill Ive learnt alot from all you, esp you Chery

I told her that :-
no. 1 - he was man enough not to dance close to this women, and told her to keep her space.
no. 2 - he has nothin to hide as he told his girlfriend immediatley about this.
no. 3 - i told her what do u care if she is prettier to some other guys as long as you are the prettiest to him

Thanks guys

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Chery agrees: Hey flower, you've grown a lot since you came on here - proud of you!
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Old Jul 24, 2006, 05:46 AM   #8  
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Thanks to u chery
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