[F]

Hey I'm a new user here and well I guess I'm asking because this is one of those questions where I don't feel like asking people I know. So here it goes.

There's this guy, he's my ex boyfriend and we dated off and on for two years. Recently we broke up, I think a little over a month ago. He does the same thing every time I get a new boyfriend, he acts like a jerk to him, ignores me, and then two weeks later he sends me a message telling me he's sorry and things go all sweet and later we get back together. This time we decided not to rush into things and so we weren't going out according to me but according to him we kind of were. And I made the mistake of getting a new boyfriend, a really sweet guy and I really do like him, but my ex thought I was just upset with him and we got into this big argument. It was like I can pretend to be happy for him when he gets a new girlfriend yet when I get a new boyfriend he doesn't have to be happy for me. I told him it scared me that he was always so sure of us being together forever and I needed to know so that's why I went out with other guys so much. He told me he didn't care, didn't want to even be friends, and found a new girl. And whenever he gets a girlfriend he brags about her only when I'm around, it's so annoying!

Then as usual he messaged me, and things got all sweet but I decided I couldn't just break up with my boyfriend for him and he seemed to understand that. Then we were sweet for a few weeks, just in a friendship way, through valentines day and through my birthday and maybe a few days after that. Then it's like he was tired of waiting and just fell for this other girl like poof! He makes me feel so unsure giving me mixed signals and talking to me then ignoring me. I know he cares, I mean he never wants anything to hurt me yet he does it all the time. It's like he can get over me so fast but it takes me forever to get over him. I feel like crying most of the time. We "fell in love" like a love at first sight thing and now I'm not sure if I should care, I can't forget about him. And getting over him seems impossible. I just don't know what to do. Should I tell him how I feel and what's going on? Or just try to move on and push him out of my life completely?

Everyone says we're perfect for each other and always going to get back together but I don't know. I act like it's OK when he's with someone else, heck I even tell the girl to go for it, and then I just want to go jump off a roof for saying that to her. The girl he likes is a really good friend of mine and she knows me and him had something and I know she wouldn't do anything to hurt me on purpose. I always thought he was perfect for me, he did everything I wanted my dream guy to do and so much more! But now it's like he might love me but toys with me when I'm with someone else and when I won't come running back into his arms. I guess I'm going on about nothing and it's not like you people know me... but I could use some advice, I just don't know. I'd rather not tell my friends, this is something where I want to tell people I don't know so well so that they don't go blabbing it to him. I just don't know what to do so... advice and help would be really nice. (Then again maybe its just me and I'm just paranoid or over jealous.)

Thanks!
-mar14luv

My honest opinion is there is too much drama here. It seems both of you are in love with drama, not each other. It also sounds like you both used the other as a safety net when your other relationships fail.

I'd suggest you both cut off contact and date other people for a year then decide if you want to give it a try. My guess is the co-dependancy you both seem to have will have wore off by then.