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I have really tried, in my relationships to make them work
I am a nice girl, or so I have been told. I have been pretty successful academically as well as in my career. My biggest problem however, is that I never end up with anyone that I love. I think I can pretty much be classified as a serial monogamy dater, and in my younger years, I never dreamt that I would not be happy and settled with a nice guy.
I have really tried, in my relationships to make them work, sometimes I even believe that I have sold myself short. I feel hopeless and worthless at times, as things really affect me a whole lot. I feel like I will never find true happiness or true love and be lonely and miserable forever. In my relationships I have sat and gone through verbal abuse all because I wanted it to work out. I give up.
Dont Give Up... Everything Happens For A Reason... You Have To Go Through Some Bad Relationships Before You Get That One Good One.... When You Find Mr.right You Will Know Its Him And Hold On To Him An D Dont Let Go... Good Luck
Location: United Kingdom - usually cold and wet here!
Posts: 1,276
Don't give up on yourself or on love for that matter. Never put up with any abuse, whether it be verbal or physical for any reason. Sometimes the things we want come when we least expect them.
Don't give up on yourself, but instead of a relationship focus being happy in other areas of your life. You maybe making bad choices in men, so take the time to reflect, and find out what makes you happy, and do the things you enjoy.
I think you've hit it on the head with the part about selling yourself short. Especially if you've tolerated abuse, verbal or otherwise. I can relate to your wanting to find someone with whom you can have a loving and meaningful relationship. However, don't make it such an important priority in your life that you neglect yourself. What I mean by that is, don't neglect your career, your family and friends and don't sell yourself short. Don't tolerate any kind of behavior that you know is unacceptable. If you're unsure of how to determine what is unacceptable behavior, just tell yourself that if it doesn't feel right, it isn't. Now, I'm not suggesting that you hold out for Prince Charming. However, don't allow anyone to manipulate you or play you. In a relationship, you make the rules and he follows the rules, or it's so long Charley! I'm not saying that you should become arrogant or controlling, but insist on being treated with respect and you treat others the same way. Put yourself in the driver's seat and stay there. Don't settle for what's not right just for the sake of having somebody. Think of it like your career ; you've worked long and hard to get where you are. You didn't just settle for doing some mundane job like washing dishes at a diner for the rest of your life just for the sake of having a job. Let's face it, you could have done that from the get-go and saved yourself all the hassels of schooling, training and climbing up the career ladder. But you didn't take that way out because you knew that, ultimately, you had much more potential than that and you'd be far better off in the long run. Look at pursuing a relationship in the same manner. Realize that it's going to take a long time for you to get what you want, especially since you're not willing to settle for less than you know you can have.
Some wise people have told me so wise things over the years.....some of them being....
'Be happy with yourself, because you can't love someone else until you love yourself'
'Love find you when you are least expecting it to find you'
'Don't settle for anything less than perfection' - that one came from my wonderful boyfriend.....who found me when I was least expecting it, but when I had already discovered that I did in fact love who I was.
You will find happiness!
Like the others have said, it will be when you least expect it.
Think about yourself for now and everything else in life that brings you joy.
Nothing is more attractive to the opposite sex than a very self confident individual who is happy with themselves.
For instance, a person who is willing to share a part of their life and happiness with another is more appealing than a person seeking for a significant other to bring them happiness in life.
The right people will be attracted to your selfconfidence...
It is time to look @ yourrself & forget men for the time being. Do things you love. Be with peoplep that like you as you are. and you like them. Love will find you in time. Be very Patient & VERY PICKY who you fall in love with
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