I have been dating this boy Kevin for 3 months and my feelings for him have grown a lot since the begining lately we have been fighting a lot and we always seem to make up but i feel like my feelings for him have been slowly slipping away. I recently talking to this boy James and the more i'm with him the more my feelings for Kevin go away. I seriously don't know what to do. please help!!
j.lynn[/font]

nauticalstar420

How old are you all?

If your feelings for Kevin are going away, be honest and tell him. It is not fair to keep stringing him along, and its not fair to let him think that everything is fine and dandy. Do you plan on leaving Kevin for this other boy?

jessika713

i honeslty don't know if i should break up with Kevin for this other boy. and were 18.

nauticalstar420

Well, how does Kevin treat you? Does he treat you good? Respect you? Think about things like that. While you may think that you like this other boy, ask yourself, will he treat you as good as Kevin does?

Are you even sure that the other boy likes you (enough to be with you)? Because you want to be sure before you break up with your current boyfriend. If you're not careful, you'll end up with no one. It sounds like you could just have a little crush on the other guy, but you've been with Kevin for 3 months. That sounds like something to me!

oneguyinohio

If you're not careful, you'll end up with no one.

That is not much of a reason to stay with Kevin. Encouraging her to hop from one man to the next...doesn't seem like the best advice. Would it be so terrible to not have someone for awhile? It would be better than staying with Kevin if she no longer has feelings for him.

nauticalstar420

I dont remember saying hop from one man to the next, but I do remember suggesting that she think about her relationship with Kevin before making any rash decisions. Whether she stays with Kevin, dumps him for the other guy, or dumps him to just be alone, it is her decision and she should do what makes her happy. Not having someone is not terrible, trust me.

And just because she has developed this little "crush" with this other guy, does not mean she doesnt have feelings for Kevin anymore. Sometimes little crushes like this can mask the feelings that we have for the ones we love, thats why I suggested to really think about how Kevin treats her and the feelings he has for her before she decides anything.

jmiles

well 3 months isnt very long but long enough 2 know whether or not this is the one for you..you answered your own question. you are with someone but you are a talking to someone else.. if you feel the need 2 go elsewhere then there is something in your current relationship that is lacking something so you feel the need 2 find it somewhere else..it could be that you have lost intrest and just havent realized it yet...ask yourself what it is that keeps you there with him and then ask yourself what makes you want 2 be with the other person...what truly makes you happy?

jessika713

well the problem is i cheated on Kevin with this kid james and o feel guilty and i just feel like i should end it with kevin because of what i did. Thank you for your advice

nauticalstar420

Ah-ha! You didnt say that before.

You need to tell Kevin about the cheating. It is the right thing to do. If you want to end it with him, he deserves to know why, and what you did. Trust me, if you're thinking of using the whole "its not you, its me" thing, it doesnt work, and no one ever falls for it. You really need to tell him the truth.

Even if you decide you want to stay with Kevin, you still need to tell him so he can decide whether or not he wants to be with someone who has cheated on him.

Either way, it is always best to be honest.

jmiles

well then you might feel guilty for what you did and honestly the best thing to do is tell him...if not then you will eat yourself up with guilt...he may understand and forgive you and maybe things will work out...but you also need to think of why you cheated on him because deep inside there is a reason..and then you need 2 work on that...