At Ask Me Help Desk you can ask questions in any topic and have them
answered for free by our experts. To ask questions or participate in
answering them you must register for a free account. By registering you
will be able to:
Get free answers from experts in any of our 300+
topics.
Girlfriend wants you to leave a really good job for her?
Ok guys
Hello by the way, so you guys and gals let me know what you think of this.
I have a good job, really good money and everything. but i travel a lot a real lot and im always away, now of course my girl gets a bit upset that im not there with her. she wanted me to leave and be with her by may, i told her that right now i can not leave my job as i have a house and many things to keep up, im not going to go off to some strange place and not know where im going or what im doing just to be with you, because if i do that. then it will just become a nightmare..
She is getting really cold and y now, so i just said look i do want to make a life with you but as of right now i can not leave my work, its not fair in me asking you to wait for me i know this, but i do want this to work.. she then tells me ohh you can leave you just dont want to lalala..
So i said well ok i cant seem to talk to you right now youv gone all supersonic on me. i then told her you wanna end it will that make you happy? coz you seem to be really upset with me and in this Long distance relationship.
So im of 2 minds 1 brake up with her
or the other one.. well im not sure what the other one is coz i dont think she can take this way much longer.
Sounds like she has made up her mind, and what you think doesn't count. Besides communicating, working together is very important, so see about a compromise. Honestly though, she wants what she wants, and I suspect if she gets it, she will want even more, but thats just my gut reaction, to what she has already told you. this doesn't sound that equal to me and what is it she brings to the table, if you give your job up?
Whatever you end up doing you do not want to have any regrets. What I mean is you do not want to leave her for a job and come to realize down the road that you were much happier with her. On the contrary, you might not want to leave your high paying job just to have you two breakup over something unrelated down the road.
Try to look at the big picture and figure out what will make you happier at the end of the day. Is it taking a salary cut to spend more time with your girlfriend or is it traveling and putting that extra money away. There many more variables but I think you get the point.
Some things to think about: Whats worth more to you, your job or your girlfriend? What would she do in your shoes? Where do you see your relationship heading?
Yeah i totaly agree. you guys are so right.. i did ask her what she would be giving up and it will be nothing really, she use to work with me but she got fired i think i spoke about this a while ago. and yeah.. i cant pay for other peoples mistakes.. i told her in the futuer i do want to be with her but she cant seem to wait that long.. she said she will accept it and see how it goes, but i dont know. but yeah ones thing for sure i can not leave my job its my life, and im working to have a nice life for me and my family if and when i have one.
I want to add in one thing...I don't think her asking you to get a "stay put" job is unreasonable at all, no matter how you couch it. When you enter a relationship, you signal that you are opening your life up to inspection and commentary. You just are.
Her telling you that you have a job that interferes with a developing relationship is at worst an unwelcome TRUTH.
Now, having added that, I agree that you quitting the job may be premature. But if you weren't already thinking along those lines before she brought it up, then I would question the shelf-life of you two anway, understand?
Dating is about finding out what it would mean to take things up a level at a time. You know the answer now. Time to move up or move on.
You have to make some choices, she wants a more seroius relationship moving on, and wants her partner home. This is commom and most ladies will want that. Men who have jobs that travel alot will often have to trade good relationships with partners for thier carreers.
You have to make some choices, she wants a more seroius relationship moving on, and wants her partner home. This is commom and most ladies will want that. Men who have jobs that travel alot will often have to trade good relationships with partners for thier carreers.
So it is time to choice often, love or a job.
If you chose the job, it was not really love.
I agree with everything but that last comment. Love is not measured by what you're willing to do. It just isn't. Love can be VERY deep and real and still be doomed. Love comes naturally. Love comes instinctively.
I say "never question the love...test the committment." That's what's happening here, as it should.
Love is a two way street, and you both give something to get something. If your doing all the giving, how is that fair? Its not. But what is fair, is an honest dialog, with some realistic plans made, and a reasonable time table, to accomplish those plans. Working together is the challenge, and the measure of a good relationship.
Linear Mode
